Michelle Kaplan

This is an All Ears English podcast, episode 2654 do you love it or hate it?

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Welcome to the All Ears English Podcast, downloaded more than 200 million times. Are you feeling stuck with your English? We'll show you how to become fearless and fluent by focusing on connection, not perfection, with your American host, Michelle Kaplan, the New York radio girl, and Aubrey Carter, the child's whiz, coming to you from Arizona and New York City, usa. And to get your transcripts delivered by email every week, go to allearsenglish.com forward/subscribe

Aubrey Carter

on today's episode, Aubry and Michelle talk about the expressions I don't love it and I don't hate it. These may not mean exactly what you think, depending on context and intonation. Learn more today so you can use these in your everyday conversations.

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Aubrey Carter

hello Michelle, how are things?

Michelle Kaplan

Things are good Aubry. How are you?

Aubrey Carter

I'm great Question for you. Do you allow eating in any room of your house or are some rooms off limits?

Michelle Kaplan

Well that's a good question. I don't think that I have like an actual strict rule about it. I think Dan is better at trying to get the kids to not eat in certain places. But I have been known to eat a meal in bed.

Aubrey Carter

That's my favorite thing to don't tell anyone.

Michelle Kaplan

But like I would never have my kids do that.

Aubrey Carter

No, absolutely right. This is it's pretty strict in our home but same same as you. It's my husband who is much more strict about it. Like no food upstairs at all. No food like kitchen only kitchen or outside. Take your popsicle out to the backyard right? Oh my God. Not anywhere else but do the kids listen? Do the kids do that? Absolutely not. They have food and snacks hidden in their rooms. They're constantly, constantly getting after them. And ever. I, I don't eat in the bed very often, but every now and then I will. Maybe it's like an emergency situation.

Michelle Kaplan

Yeah, totally. Yeah.

Aubrey Carter

Emergency, emergency. Like, I have my glass of wine next to the bed and I'm like, yeah, that's an emergency.

Michelle Kaplan

Fine. Yes, exactly. So today we're going to talk about a fun yet light way to say that you don't like something. And we're talking about this because I heard Dan say this in the context of what we're talking about.

Aubrey Carter

Love it.

Michelle Kaplan

So the story is my kids were eating something with honey. I forget what it was, and it was they were on the couch over the carpet. And he said, I don't love honey on the carpet.

Aubrey Carter

That is amazing. I say this a lot and my husband does too.

Progressive Insurance Advertiser

Right.

Aubrey Carter

And what we really mean is you should not be eating on the carpet. You should not be eating while sitting on the couch. Because what we're saying is I don't want you to get honey on the couch or on the carpet. So I don't want you to be eating honey over there. And this is how we say it. Don't. And sometimes we'll say like, I don't love the idea of honey on the carpet or I don't love honey on the carpet. Totally. Yeah.

Michelle Kaplan

And I. And I wrote it down because it just made me laugh. And it's very natural and it's a common way to say you don't want something. You don't want something to happen. Like, don't do something. Absolutely. Yeah. So this is, this is going to be fun. So first we, first of all, guys, we want to remind you to hit the follow button or subscribe on YouTube wherever you are. Listening to, listening to or watching the All Ears English podcast. So you never miss anything. And also, Aubrey, we want to say thank you so much to our listeners who have written reviews for us.

Aubrey Carter

Yes, exactly. We're going to shout out a couple of your names now from Apple podcasts, Annie in China and Cirque Sarasom. Thank you so much for your reviews, your ratings, everyone who leaves a review, wherever that is, Spotify, Android, Apple, in the app on YouTube, all of these comments and ratings and reviews, we love them, we read them. They really help us have the motivation to keep going to plan these great episodes for you.

Michelle Kaplan

Absolutely. So if you haven't written on a review, please do so. We really do Read them. We send them around to each other. Makes our days. So, all right, so let's get into it. So this construction is, I don't love X. I don't love something.

Aubrey Carter

For example, I don't love staying up past 11. That's true for me. Except I could say, I don't love staying up past nine. Yeah, I'm tired.

Michelle Kaplan

Right.

Aubrey Carter

Because I'm up so early. So I'm tired really early.

Michelle Kaplan

Get up early. Yeah. Or I don't love the redecorating done in this room. Right. So I don't love it.

Aubrey Carter

Don't say that to someone who did the redecorating.

Michelle Kaplan

No, no, no, no, no.

Aubrey Carter

Or I don't love this combination of salty and sweet. So this is a kind of a positive spin when you're in a restaurant, for example, and what you mean is, I don't like this. But you're trying to be positive. You're trying not to say something rude. This is a nicer way to say that I don't love this.

Michelle Kaplan

Right, right, exactly. So, yeah, I mean, you answered my question. I was gonna say, how does that sound to you? It does sound like you're trying to be a little bit soft, softer. You know, you're not trying to be too blunt and you might give more details after.

Aubrey Carter

You might be like, I don't love it, but I've had worse.

Michelle Kaplan

Right, exactly. Yeah. So to me, it sounds light. And even though you may not love it, you may not hate it. Right. It just depends on the context and the tone.

Aubrey Carter

So you probably wouldn't say this if you did hate it. You'd say something else. You'd be like, it's not my favorite. Something like.

Michelle Kaplan

Right, right, right, exactly. So here's an example. I don't love this color, but I think we should go with it for now. So maybe you need to make a decision for a presentation or whatever it is, and you're saying, okay, well, we need to just get this done. So I don't love it, but let's just go with it.

Aubrey Carter

I probably said this about the color. We painted our house because we wanted to go really light, like almost white. But we had to choose from HOA colors, like pre approved colors. And none of them were very light. And we were so frustrated. And they fine you if you don't choose one of their colors. So we chose the lightest one they had, which was not as light as we wanted. And we'd be like, I don't love this, but we're just gonna have to go with it because we have no other option.

Michelle Kaplan

Right? Yeah, yeah, that's a perfect example. Or Aubrey, you were talking about wine in bed. You could say, I don't love this wine with this dish, but I see why they put them together. Oh, yeah.

Aubrey Carter

Because sometimes there will be a suggested pairing and you'll be like, it's not what I would have chosen, but I can kind of get it right.

Michelle Kaplan

Like, I understand it right for me.

Aubrey Carter

I don't know about you, Michelle, but I'm like every cabernet Sauvignon. Give me a cab sav. I'm gonna love it. I don't think I've ever had a cab sav I didn't like. I love.

Michelle Kaplan

I like Malbec.

Aubrey Carter

Oh, Malbec's good too. Yes. I mean, everyone has their favorites, but in general, I even like the, like, four dollar one at Trader Joe's. Like, give me delicious.

Michelle Kaplan

That's so funny. So this could actually, though, also sound a bit more serious or even used to reprimand someone or give rules. Like Dan and the honey. Like, I don't love honey on the car. Like, we're not, you know, doing this.

Aubrey Carter

What you really mean is don't eat honey on the carpet. Exactly.

Michelle Kaplan

Right, Right. So I don't love where this conversation is going right now. So it's like you can tell things are maybe getting a little bit more argumentative with someone. Things are coming up. And so you might say, I don't love where this is going right now. Like, maybe we should just talk about something else.

Aubrey Carter

And this is really interesting. It is a little bit loaded. If you are wanting to pivot to something else we've talked about on the podcast, ways to do that, ways to change the subject. And this is one way to do that. But there is an implication here of criticizing the other person. You are telling them something they just said or the way they're handling the conversation, the way they're reacting to you or not listening to you, you don't love. And so you are letting them know that in a kind way before pivoting away. And so when you say this, you're intentionally giving them that message. Like, I don't like the way you've been. Something about the way you've been handling this. So let's talk about something. Then you're gon change the subject, but you want that message to be clear. And that's when we would say this.

Michelle Kaplan

Yeah, yeah, exactly. Or what's another example, Aubrey?

Aubrey Carter

Then you might say, I don't love how you've been ignoring some of my emails. So this could be a co worker that is not responding to a lot of your emails and you're trying to figure out a way to say it a little bit playfully, but also let them know, like, you need to read my emails and respond.

Michelle Kaplan

Yeah, yeah, Be careful with this one. To a co worker, you know, it would have to be like, I would

Aubrey Carter

say this to you, Michelle, maybe.

Michelle Kaplan

Exactly. Somebody you're close with, you can be truthful with.

Aubrey Carter

Well, playful. Right. I'd be like so playful with.

Michelle Kaplan

Exactly.

Aubrey Carter

Love the way you're ignoring all of my emails. But I also, I don't even know if I would do that because I would know there's probably a reason you're super busy and there's still implied criticism there. So I would probably still be like, did you happen to see my last email?

Michelle Kaplan

Right, right, right, exactly.

Aubrey Carter

Yeah. Because this doesn't show like, you do need to be careful. This is maybe more. If you have already tried to be careful and now you need to be more clear, but you're still trying to use language that is kind and polite. This would work.

Michelle Kaplan

Yeah, yeah. Really interesting. And you also might just hear people say, I don't love it. Right. So for example, let's do this little role play. What do you think of the new roller coaster they added?

Aubrey Carter

I don't love it. Yeah. And this, I'm probably going to share more details because if you just stop there, it's like, it feels a little brusque. But then if you're like, I got sick. Honestly, we were upside down way too long. You would probably give details about why you didn't love it.

Michelle Kaplan

Exactly. All right, so we are going to go over the opposite in just a minute after the break. All right.

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Michelle Kaplan

So, Aubrey, so can you say the opposite? Can you say, I don't hate something or I don't hate it?

Aubrey Carter

Absolutely. Right. Well, I don't hate it. It actually means the same thing. I think. If I'm like, I don't love it or I'm like, I don't hate it, it's kind of the same for me. Both of them. I'm like, it wasn't worse. It is interesting to me. Interesting. It is kind of the same.

Michelle Kaplan

Yeah. Yeah. So you could. You could say, oh, I don't. I don't hate it.

Aubrey Carter

Yeah, that's what I said.

Michelle Kaplan

Right. And it can actually be pretty positive sounding in a weird way.

Aubrey Carter

Yeah. Let's do a little role. So.

Michelle Kaplan

Yeah.

Aubrey Carter

What do you think of the coffee? I know you're a coffee snobby.

Michelle Kaplan

Let's see. I don't hate it.

Aubrey Carter

Okay. Yeah.

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Yeah.

Michelle Kaplan

It is interesting because if I said I don't, love would mean more I like it sounds worse than saying I don't hate it.

Aubrey Carter

That is really interesting. And I guess that makes sense because I don't hate it should mean a little more like I actually like it. And it is like this feels more like actually I like it. And we'll often say that when we're surprised. Like maybe we expected to not like something and then we liked it. Huh. I don't hate it. Like, I thought I would hate it, but I don't.

Michelle Kaplan

So funny how these expressions work. But you can also use it like this. So here's an example. I went to the mall and they put in a new restaurant. I didn't hate it. It'll probably do well there.

Aubrey Carter

Nice. And I. When I say this, I, I. The intonation is interesting. Right. If I say, like, I didn't hate it, that sounds like I also didn't love it. But if I say, like, I went to the mall and they painted a new restaurant, I didn't hate it. It would probably do well. Then that means I really liked it. It's all about your intonation. There's intonation that can make it sound huge.

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Right.

Aubrey Carter

I didn't hate it is like, absolutely hated it.

Michelle Kaplan

You can't just say this in a monotone.

Aubrey Carter

No. Or at least it Wouldn't you have clear. If you're like, I didn't hate it, that sounds like, I didn't really like it, but I didn't hate it.

Michelle Kaplan

Right, Right. So if you. If you are a little bit more emphatic, like, oh, I didn't hate it, and sound a little surprised, that sounds more like it.

Aubrey Carter

Totally interesting. So this is tricky. You could confuse someone depending on the intonation you use and the context. Right. You need very clear intonation and also recognize that is a possibility. These. There are lots of different meanings depending on the intonation. So anticipate that. That there could be misunderstandings when you trying to use these and then make sure to share details after that. Make it clear if you're like, I didn't hate it. It was actually amazing. The dessert was fantastic. The entree. Right. The more details you share, the more it's clear what you meant by that phrase.

Michelle Kaplan

Exactly. Exactly.

Aubrey Carter

I mean.

Michelle Kaplan

Or you could say something like, I don't hate what they've done with the design. Right. So that's more positive sounding rather than like, oh, I don't hate what they've done with the design. Exactly.

Aubrey Carter

And again, the more detail you share, if you then share how you loved the spiral staircase, or yes, you love whatever about the line, the motif, then that's going to clue them into what you actually mean.

Michelle Kaplan

Right? Yeah. So, guys, again, it can be a little tricky because of context, intonation. Aubrey, you. You also used the word loaded to talk about this earlier. There's a lot to this. Like, I would say I think I don't love it is a little bit more natural and easier to kind of navigate. But I don't know if you agree. It just really.

Aubrey Carter

I can see what you mean. I think I use I don't love it more often. I use I don't hate it more with like, really exaggerate, exaggerated intonation to share that I expected to dislike something.

Michelle Kaplan

Right.

Aubrey Carter

And I'm surprised how much I loved it. Right. If I get like a cheap ice cream that I'm like, this might not be good because it was two bucks at the. Or whatever. And then I'm like, oh, I don't hate this because I am also sharing that I expected to not be impressed. And I. And then I was.

Michelle Kaplan

Yes. And isn't that the best?

Aubrey Carter

Yes.

Michelle Kaplan

You might also say, I'm pleasantly surprised.

Grainger Advertiser

Right.

Michelle Kaplan

That's a good bonus. Pleasantly surprised.

Aubrey Carter

Surprised, yes. So this is a role play. We are friends at a hot sauce store trying samples. Michelle, I have to tell you because hot Sauce has come up here. Have you seen the TV show. I know. What's it called? Corporate retreat.

Michelle Kaplan

Company retreat.

Aubrey Carter

Retreat.

Michelle Kaplan

Aubry. We have so many of. We have to talk about this later.

Aubrey Carter

We will. Yeah. So, guys, we.

Michelle Kaplan

Michelle, that's exactly what I was thinking

Aubrey Carter

about when I. Michelle. When. So we are going to speak more about this off the air, but I just want to share with all of you listening, if you haven't seen it, you've got to watch it. I loved it so much. You need to first watch Jury Duty. That was the first season. Incredible. Which was incredible. James Marsin is. Is so amazing in it. And the. The whole setup is that there's one person who doesn't realize they're on a TV show that they're. It's like Candid Camera, where they don't realize everyone else is an actor. Everyone's an actor except one person who's just a normal person, like me or Michelle or anybody out there listening. And they're. But they're filming everything because they're like, oh, we're filming for a documentary, whatever. So they know there are cameras. So they're maybe on a little bit on better behavior because they know their cameras, but they don't know that everyone else is an actor. And these actors are doing increasingly crazy stuff to see how this regular person reacts. And it is so funny. I laugh so hard. So watch Jury.

Michelle Kaplan

We're obsessed with it. It's like. And it's also so good because they're such short episodes. Like, it's not like they go by. They're not. Yeah, it's awesome.

Aubrey Carter

So go watch it.

Grainger Advertiser

Guys.

Aubrey Carter

I'm glad you remember the name of it, because I was calling it Corporate retreat, but it's Company retreat.

Michelle Kaplan

Company. Company retreat.

Aubrey Carter

Yes. Guys, go watch it.

Michelle Kaplan

Yeah.

Aubrey Carter

Leave a comment for us on YouTube to see if you liked it as much as Michelle and I did, and then we'll talk about it more later. I'm obsessed. I think it's so fun.

Michelle Kaplan

I love it, too. I love it, too.

Aubrey Carter

All right, so here we are. So fun trying sa. Okay, this one is called Hot, Hot, Hot.

Michelle Kaplan

Okay, I'll try it. I don't love it.

Aubrey Carter

Yeah, I mean, I don't love when there's a fruity taste to a hot sauce. If it's sweet.

Michelle Kaplan

Yeah, same. All right, next one. Hotter than the Sun.

Aubrey Carter

Okay, here goes. I don't hate it.

Michelle Kaplan

Yeah, it's not bad.

Aubrey Carter

Nice. Right? And so there. When I say I don't hate it, I mean I really like this.

Michelle Kaplan

Interesting.

Aubrey Carter

So Good.

Michelle Kaplan

Yeah. So first I said, I'm trying. And I said, I don't love it. So this definitely sounds like I'm not a huge fan. Exactly.

Aubrey Carter

You're like, I don't hate it, but I certainly wouldn't, like, order it and put it on a barbecue sandwich. Right. I don't like it that much. And then I said, yeah, I don't love when there's a fruity taste in a barbecue sauce. We'll often use it this way. I'm saying it means the exact same thing as I don't like when there's blah, blah, blah. But we say it this way as well. I don't love when it's like this.

Michelle Kaplan

Yeah. And then I said, okay, next one. So we're going to the next sample. I said, hotter than the sun. And you said, okay, here goes. And then you said, I don't hate it, which means you're pleasantly surprised. You thought that you. What? You. You. You didn't have high hopes based on the laughter.

Aubrey Carter

This other fruity one, I'm like, these are all gonna be gross. And then this one I love. So I'm like, okay, I don't hate it. Meaning I don't really like this one. But again, if the intonation were different, if I was just like, I don't hate it, I don't hate it. I mean, like, it's okay. So it really depends on your intonation here. So go back and listen. Pay attention to the intonation we're using. It is sort of over exaggerated. If you're wanting to say, I love this, I don't hate this. It's pretty extreme intonation. Yeah.

Michelle Kaplan

So, guys, if you haven't already, go back a few episodes. We did. That was 2648 of the Ollie's English podcast. That was tough love for your English. So, Aubry, takeaways for today. I mean, this is just so interesting. There's so much about context intonation really paying attention here and considering how. How you want to use these phrases. But they are very natural.

Aubrey Carter

Absolutely. And variety of vocabulary. You don't want to say, I like this, I like that. That I don't like this. I don't like that. That's so boring. These are way more interesting ways to say that.

Michelle Kaplan

Oh, my gosh.

Aubrey Carter

Are preparing for the IELTS exam. You know, we have another podcast, IELTS Energy. But if you're listening to All Yours English, which you should be as well, to learn vocabulary and strategies and improve your listening skills, this is a great IELTS strategy to avoid vocabulary this is high scoring vocabulary that pushes you to use high scoring pronunciation to instead of saying I like this and I like that. I didn't hate that, I didn't love that. Use this on IELTS speaking exam, huh?

Michelle Kaplan

Exactly. All right, Aubry, this has been so much fun. And guys, we'll see you on the next episode.

Aubrey Carter

See you next time.

Michelle Kaplan

Bye.

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