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The opposite of magnetism is desperation. It's I need you to choose me because I don't choose myself. And if you choose me, that will deem me to be worthy. And the magnetic person doesn't care. The magnetic person is so self assured they've gone through the depths of their own hell. Go. Trust flow sooner. Go. I'm the one I've been waiting for. Welcome back to the High Self Podcast. To me, spirituality is not about getting somewhere, but rather about becoming the most magnetic, embodied and radiant version of you. And this is exactly what we're going to be discussing in today's solo cast. So many of us go through these dark nights of the soul, these stages of our life where the rug is pulled from under our feet and it feels like we don't even know who we are. And this is our invitation to become our most magnetic self. So I have kind of looked at the seven tips that have embodied my magnetism more than any and how you can too. So be sure to listen till the end. And before we get started with this episode, I saw that over 50% of you guys are not yet subscribed to the podcast, which don't worry about it. I'm not offended, but I'd love to keep hanging out. I'm having a good time with you, so just subscribe to it wherever you're listening to this on YouTube, Spotify, Apple Podcasts. It helps me reach more people, reach you with our upcoming episodes, and get this message out into the world. So be sure to hit subscribe. And now let's get into the episode. So first of all, what does it mean to be magnetic? So to me, magnetism is a natural, alluring quality that happens both for men and women. But I'm going to be speaking into the woman's experience more of when we have fully touched the corners of our consciousness, the corners of our womb, the deepest parts inside of ourself, and we are no longer afraid of who we are. And so that thing that might have happened that felt really difficult and challenging actually opens up the doorway for you to become magnetic. So I always say my shadows made me sexy, plus they gave me somewhere ass, which is lyrics for my song Sexy Dark Night of the Soul. And to me, what that really means is that when you stop caring so much about getting everything right and being perfect, you open up to this natural, sexy way of being. And often it takes the dark night of the soul to truly embody that sexiness. So to me, being magnetic is being true to who you are. It's being authentic. It's being able to make a joke and like snap back into things and know that you don't have to perform or act a certain way in order to get validation. And the only people that you really want in your corner are those that are here for your full expression. And when you are magnetic, you attract people in because most people don't have this quality. Most people are still operating from that good girl or good boy consciousness where they're trying to get it right and you know, get the tap on the head and be approved. And you know, how many times even in our own journeys when you like someone, you're starting to think, what do they like? And how do I be more like that instead of how can I be more embodied in my meanness? And we can feel that desperation. So the opposite of magnetism is desperation, inspiration. It's I need you to choose me because I don't choose myself. And if you choose me, that will deem me to be worthy. And the magnetic person doesn't care. The magnetic person is so self assured they've gone through the depths of their own hell. And because of that they're like, oh, you don't like me? Who cares? Because I really with me. And that is the integration of the dark feminine that makes them so magnetic. So my first tip that I'm going to give is feeling it all fully. So feeling whatever you're in. I'm writing my book right now and I talk about the dark night of the soul and how we can use that as fuel to become the version of ourself that wouldn't have been possible without it. And so the first step is feeling it all. And the tip I'm going to give is called the triple E method. So this is the method that I created after my divorce. That stands for the first E emote, the second E embody, and the third E express. Emote, embody and express. So feel whatever's coming up. Maybe you wake up and you're crying every single morning, or maybe you want to punch a pillow, or maybe you are just feeling so disgusted with these men, or maybe you're just so disappointed and feeling that, giving it the microphone, paying attention to it, because it's only when we feel the feeling that it can be cleared through our system. So emote second embody. Now move your body in the way that you want to feel. If you feel really lonely, what does it feel like to feel held? If you feel really ugly, what does it move like to feel beautiful? Can you create that in A body posture. Can you feel where it is in your body? Can you dance to one song that embodies that? You know, maybe you're feeling really sad, girl, it's like, can you play, I don't know, bootylicious if that's how you want to feel. Like something that brings out that energy for you. And then from that embodied place, the last e express. So expressing, whether it is recording a voice memo of yourself, just stream of consciousness, talking, whatever is coming through, creating, creating art, writing a poem, writing a song, doing an improv dance, going on Instagram live, starting a podcast, writing a book, like, whatever that thing is for you, all of this energy wants to be expressed. And when we can give it again that microphone, it no longer has a hold of us. So I always say that lover girls are really artists in disguise. And often we have to go through the initiation of heartbreak for us to start to feel all the things that we wouldn't have felt before to create the art that we're really here to make. And this trip e method is how I started to produce music, sing rap, created my album that now has millions of streams and is even played on radio stations. And none of this would have been possible without my sexy, dark night of the soul. So my first tip for becoming more magnetic is feel it all. My second tip is surrendering. So we often go through life with this, like, controlling, planning. Like, I need to make sure things are going to go a certain way, right? And so we're always thinking 20 steps ahead. When you met someone, you're thinking about the wedding, you got an idea, you're thinking about, how am I going to make money doing this? Like, we're always giving ourselves anxiety around something that hasn't happened. And what I feel the dark night of the soul brings you is this full surrender. It is this full, like, look, life didn't go my way. And there's something very humbling about that experience that now you're no longer trying to control because you're like, look, I don't fucking know. I thought my life was going to be like this. I thought by this age I would be married and have kids and have this much money in this house and this whatever, and it's not. And so maybe there's something so much greater out there that I could not have imagined for myself. And instead of me planning and controlling, I'm going to listen. And by listening, I may be guided to places that I would have never taken myself. So follow the flow. Follow the surrender path. My new song that is coming out right now is called Trust the Path. And the lyrics came to me in the medicine ceremony when I was trying to think, you know, like, how can I be in a forever relationship and this and my business and my this and my that. And the medicine kept telling me this. It kept making me repeat this again and again. Trust the path Let it all unfold Just release the control Trust the path Let it all unfold Just release the control Trust the path Let it all unfold Just release the control and so I turned that into a song and I taught myself to do this Indian chanting called Kolokal. And the music video is now out. And I will link that below. I'll actually play it for you guys as well. And this music video is all about embodying the void. It's about going into the darkness and not being afraid of it, because that is how you truly become magnetic. And in the music video, you see me going into the darkness and finding so much beauty in it. And out comes the black snake, which is looking at the shadow face to face and no longer being afraid of it, but rather dancing with it, creating beauty of it, and eventually becoming the snake mother. And so this is really the symbolism of the thing that you are the most afraid of happening is actually what makes you become your most magnetic self. And so this music video for Trust the Path is now out. And I'm so excited to continue to share my art pieces with you. And so the surrender experiment is what brought me here, and I'm so excited to see what it creates in your life. The number three thing to become your most magnetic self is to speak the uncomfortable truth. Now, I know when I say that, you're thinking, oh, so you have to be harsh. You have to say something that's gonna irk people. No. Sometimes the uncomfortable truth is I love you. Sometimes the uncomfortable truth is, where's this going? Sometimes the uncomfortable truth is I want to spend more time with you. These are the things that actually our inner good girl is afraid of saying. And it's funny, because we think the good girl is super nice and pleasing, but she's actually silenced. But it's actually the integration of our dark feminine that allows us to say the uncomfortable thing. And uncomfortable could be, I want to be closer friends with you. I want to get to know you better. Like, these are also uncomfortable things for us to say. Why? Because we're afraid of the rejection that might happen. And so saying the uncomfortable truth is the only way that we can create the life that we want. Because Otherwise, we are waiting for life to happen for us. And it is this feminine fantasy that we have in our little girl maiden consciousness of, like, someone's gonna find me and give me everything I ever wanted. Deeper than that, someone's gonna save me. Who are they saving you from? Yourself. She don't wanna be saved. Don't save her. You know, I love Megan the Stallion. And. And I think it's really interesting, like, people are speaking a lot about her because she is an example of a woman who has become so magnetic that even when she is betrayed, she says, I'm not gonna be silenced. I'm gonna speak the uncomfortable truth. And she's receiving so much support. She's like, on a Broadway show right now, and I'm gonna speak about that more. But turning your pain into your art. And so when you are not afraid of saying the uncomfortable truth, you have the friendships you want, the relationships you want the dynamics you want the career. I recently watched this reel of Meryl Streep being interviewed, and she was saying how when they came to her to be in the Devil Wears Prada, they offered her X amount of money, and she knew that this movie needed her, and she said, no, my rate is double. And they said, okay. And so when a woman knows her worth and she's not afraid of speaking the uncomfortable truth and she's also not willing to walk away, incredible things happen. And you might say, well, she's Meryl Streep. Well, she decided to become Meryl Stre. Who is Meryl Streep? It's just a name, but because of her becomingness, it has a weight to it. And so what's your name? I want your name to be a verb. I want your name to be. Oh, that is so Rachel Adams. I think that's an actual Notebook lady. I don't know where that came from. You know? My name is Sahara Rose, and I hear people now say. And I'm just a normal person, and I hear people say, oh, my God, it was such a Sahara Rose moment for me. Like, this crazy thing happened, and I just, like, came out with, like, music videos, and I'm dancing and DJing and doing all these things, and I'm like, whoa, I love that my name has become a verb for that. For becoming your most magnetic self after your dark night of the soul. Like, I freaking love. And so what is your name gonna be a verb for? What are you going to be the example for? And this allows us to see that you get to be created. You know, magnetic people are people who have created the different details about their life. They're not, again, waiting for life to dress them, to style them, to give them a personality, because otherwise, you're just going to end up on the conveyor belt of life, where it's like, you know, the Abercrombie and Fitch consciousness, and, you know, you get the white picket fence and you just follow the procedure of guy meets girl. And I guess now we should probably get engaged, and I guess we should probably have a baby and probably have a second one and now probably have a divorce. You know, it's. Most people are on that conveyor belt, and it's the people who've decided to snap off of it of, like, you know what? I'm gonna dye my hair pink. You know what? I'm gonna move to Brazil. You know what? I'm gonna do whatever fucking thing that's taking a risk. You know, I want to add this as the next thing number four, taking risks. The magnetic person, not just speaking the truth, they're doing the uncomfortable thing they are taking with the jokes they crack sometimes, the content they post, the conversations they have, the way they dress, the way they show up. And a lot of us, we want to be iconic, right? Icons are people who took risks. So what risk are you willing to take? Are you willing to speak that uncomfortable truth on Instagram and actually hold space for that conversation? Are you willing to go on a date and say, you know what? I'm a feminist. Are you willing to show yourself on a medicine journey when you know your Christian family is going to look at your Instagram stories? You know, whatever. The thing is for you, we all have to be willing to take a risk. I did not get here by not taking risks. I grew up in a Persian Iranian family, first person to be born outside of the US from the most suppressed country on earth where no one in my family has dated before they were married. Really? Definitely. No woman has worked. No woman has gotten a divorce. Like, these are all things that. Well, actually, technically, my aunt did, and that was a very, very big deal. So I will say I'm not the first woman who got a divorce luckily, but I'm the first woman to be living here in this country and definitely sharing about it on the Internet. And so back in the day, if someone got divorced, it was like, I don't even think they told me she got divorced until I was, like, 18. It was like, just to let you know, you know? And now we get to lead by the things that our mothers and grandmothers swept under the Rug of like, no, you don't have to hide these things anymore. And we have to lean in first to do that. And that's the most magnetic thing. The person who is able to lean in first. Like, we all want to be tastemakers. What is a tastemaker? The person who is able to go against the cultural norm. They're not, you know, waiting for the Chanel bag and the Birkin and the whatever the hell they're wearing these days. And all the cities are the same. Right. It's the person who creates their own style, who creates their own expression, who creates their own lingo, who creates their own culture. Like, this is what is truly magnetic. And it comes from taking risks. And taking risks means not being liked and coming back to being okay with that because you don't want to be liked by people who you don't actually respect. Because what does that mean? Oh, they approve of me, but they don't actually even like you. Like, those people are not even thinking about you. They're only thinking about themselves. And we minimize ourselves our whole entire lives to gain their approval when all they're thinking is, how do I gain more people's approval? And it's this, like, never ending mlm of improve approval. Like, where are you all going? You all have the same plastic surgery, you all do your hair the same way, you wear the same clothes, you have the same baggage. Where are we going with this is Stepford Wives? And so it's like snapping out of that reality and taking a risk in your life and your expression and your embodiment and your choices in every single way you gotta around and find out. And that's what makes you magnetic. If you've gone through a breakup, a heartbreak, a divorce, or another dark night of the soul, I want to tell you congratulations, because the best is yet to come. If I've learned anything about the Sacred Feminine journey is it begins with a rupture. That's when you meet the snake, the shadow, the thing that you didn't want to see, and you start walking the path of the rose, trusting the unfolding of your life, allowing the synchronicities to guide you that take you places that you could have never imagined before. If you're feeling me, you're feeling this message deep in your bones, then I invite you to join the Sacred Feminine pathway. This is where I guide you step by step in this journey. I share what Sacred Feminine spirituality is, is all about and how it's different than the masculine path that we're taught, which is just seated Meditations and trying to, you know, persevere and push our bodies through cold plunges and breath work. Whereas the feminine path is all about embodiment, beauty, joy, dance, singing, music, art, creativity. I talk about how to alchemize our dark night of the soul, how to move through those shadows and blossom as an even more embodied and beautiful iteration of ourselves on the other side. Because I know these obstacles are actually quantum leaps into new timelines. Sacred Feminine Pathway is now available for an opening price of just $27. That's right, only $27, which is less than a meal out. You can head over to the Show Notes to get it right away, and I can't wait to invite you inside. So the fifth way to become a more magnetic person is to make art. So I talked about lover girls who are just artists in disguise, and what does art really mean? So I've been writing about this extensively in my new book, which I will announce right now. I guess you had to be really into the podcast to get this announcement, but it is called tentatively. It might change. I don't think it will, though. Maybe this love story is really about me. And it hit me one day that, you know, when I was going through the healing after my divorce, I'm like, who am I going to end up with? And what is he going to be like? And da, da, da, da, da. That I realized maybe this love story is not about who I end up with, but maybe, just maybe, it is about who I become. Because I have become unrecognizable to that former version of myself. And I would actually go through that shit. The infidelity, divorce, the dark night of the soul, the countless months of tears. I would go through that 10,000 more times to become this version of myself that I am today. And the thing that I am the most proud of in this journey was the art that I created. Turning the affirmations. I would tell myself, like, trust, flow, surrender, let go, like be the vibe, gotta hypnotize. Then you'll magnetize. Don't you compromise, like all of these different healings for myself, turning them into epic Afrobeats that you can shake your ass to. So I will link my music below. Now, what is the art for you? Maybe the art is writing poetry. Maybe the art is modern dancing. Oh, my God. I just went to a modern dance class for the first time since maybe high school this weekend. And no words, no choreography, just following the flow. It was all about finding this wave in your body and letting it guide you. And it felt like, oh, my God, this is what I do when I'm, like, by myself, listening to music, feeling this energy take over me. And I've never been in a space that everyone's just doing that. There's zero performance around it, and it's just this full expression, and that is art. The best art is when it's not for anyone else, but it's for you. So maybe your art is, you know, singing. A friend of mine, she realized that she had such an amazing opera voice, and she has never sang opera in her life, but she was like, when I'm in the shower, I just want a belt. Like, this has always been a thing for me. And she started to take opera classes, and now she performs opera. What? That's possible. Maybe you want to pick up the guitar. Maybe you want to do pottery. Maybe you want to get horses and take care of them. Maybe you want to do improv. Maybe you want to do musical theater. Maybe you want to take a karaoke. Maybe you want to be on the street dressed up like a statue and do some miming. Like, whatever the thing is that you want to do, it's all art. So art is just to turn emotion into expression. Right? The triple E. And that art becomes the thing that is your saving grace, that, you know, people come in and out of our lives. Life is crazy. But your art stays with you, and it's the gift that keeps giving. And it's the thing that after everything happens, you are so proud of yourself that you poured into this, and it crystallizes who you are at different versions of your life. You're like, oh, my God. Like, when I look back at my music videos, I'm like, that was my sexy, dark night of the soul era in my moto gear, twerking on my motorcycle. Like, all y'. All. You know, that was my. My body is an altar dancing in the unknown. Like, my very first music video, really coming out with the white bow of, like, yes, I'm sensual, but I've got boundaries, and I love that I've turned these into. Into art projects. Now, another way you can do this that I super, super recommend is just photo shoots. Like, take epic photo shoots of yourself. Like, create a beautiful background in your own home. Get some cool outfits and jewelry. Put your phone on video and just pose and move. And then after take scre of the video, and there you have a photo shoot. And to me, it's like a living embodiment of this new version of you. And I write about this more in my new book so the sixth way to become more magnetic is to be open hearted. So open hearted doesn't mean, oh, I'm just obsessed with anyone who pays attention to me. No, it rather means I am open to trusting my heart more than my mind. I'm going to let my body speak, I'm going to follow the flow of life. Rather than this mental projection of like, well, I should be friends with this kind of person or I should date that kind of person, I should do that kind of career. Anytime there's a should, you know you're ingesting poison. And so when we are open hearted, we are actually able to tune into what's right for us. We are no longer shoulding our way through life and actually we get to go on surprises and delights that the universe could have never imagined. You know, in my own journey that I've been talking about, I met this girl one time. We went on a walk, we got along really well and then we're like, let's go to Afro Nation in Portugal together. And we literally booked a trip together. And I've hung out with her one time, but I just followed my heart. And then that same friend was like, we should go to Brazil Carnival. I was like, we don't know anyone in Brazil. And she's like, I kind of know someone. And. And then someone DM'd me on Instagram, a random stranger. She said, you've got the Brazilian sauce. Why did she say that? Because I was dancing freely. She's like, you got that Brazilian sauce. I said, you know what? I've been thinking of coming to Brazil, to Rio Carnival. Do you have any tips for me? She's like, oh my God, I live in Brazil. I have so many tips for you. I was like, let's hop on a Zoom call. She's like, where do you live? La. She had landed in LA that day. I said, why don't you come over? She came over. We end up hanging out the whole night talking about so many things, like long lost soul sisters. And so when I went to Brazil, I ended up traveling with her for another month. Then I went to her. She's like, why don't you even stay one more month and we'll go to Uruguay for my sister's wedding. I said, why not? And I just followed that flow and ended up just having so many adventures, so many synchronicities, and it entirely shifted who I am. Like, I feel like Dudu Bame is still Brasileira, you know, I feel like a Brazilian inside now. And that would not have been possible without following that flow. And it doesn't need to necessarily be traveling, though I really recommend traveling because it's very all immersive. But it could just be talking to the person at the yoga class and then going out for coffee. And then if they say they're going to a random friend's thing, go with them and be open and then talk to someone else and see where that takes you and go somewhere else. And you will be so amazed by the way that life directs you to exactly what you need. Just today when I was getting my hair done, the lady who came over, we were talking and then she was, she noticed, you know, my whole entire home is like hieroglyphic walls and goddess altars and all the things. And she said, you know, I'm very spiritual. I was like, oh, cool. And. And we were talking about spirituality and something in my inner voice said, give her your Ayurveda book. Because I've written several books on Ayurveda. We didn't talk about Ayurveda at all, but I just trusted my inner voice because my heart was open. And so I said, I'm not sure if you're into Ayurveda, but I want to give you this book of mine. She starts bawling. She says, I have been wanting to sign up for Ayurveda school. In fact, I reached out to the school, they haven't responded to me. And I was looking for a sign to see if this was the right direction. You hand me this book. She's like, I will do freestyling of your hair, you know. And I say that because sometimes you are the messenger for someone of what they need to hear. And people are messengers for you. And the divine is working through us. And so trust when you're open hearted, you can trust that flow of life so purely that will take you places you could have never done have. You speak things you would have never thought before, and then you're met by people who exactly needed to see that, hear that, that, feel that, and it takes you guys both on this other journey. We are really here to all be alchemists to one another's experiences. And the more we're able to be open hearted, the more we can surrender to that. And there's nothing more magnetic than a magician that makes things happen. So be open hearted en numero siete. The last one enjoying the process. Have you ever noticed magnetic? People are never the ones complaining about life. They're never the ones that are like, it's just, is so hard with social media and the traffic and the weather and the this and the that and that. We get it. We're all here. We all can see the problems. But the magnetic people are the ones that somehow let it slide off them. Like, you know when you're with a friend and you guys are maybe sitting in traffic, some friends are complaining the whole time. Oh, my God, why is this guy not moving? Why isn't he moving? What a dumbass. Can't you see? And it's like the whole car ride is. Is so, like, painful to deal with because of this person's energy versus you have another friend. You're sitting in traffic, you didn't even realize. Like, you guys are having deep conversations. You're like, oh, my God. By the way, I found this song, Infatuation by Christine Aguilera. Do you remember the song? It's like, oh, my God. He comes from a foreign place an island far away and treats me with ever and some breathless. Somehow this can keep my cool and so those people. It's like you can be in traffic for four hours and you're like, wait, we're here already. Wait, can we get in more? I don't even. The car is better than the party, you know? And it's like, I always feel like that. I always feel like my car rides, my hanging out at home. It's always better than whenever I'm going to. Why? There's one common ingredient here, you know, it's like you set the vibe. And so the magnetic people are the ones who are creating that experience. And they're enjoying the ride. We're in traffic. I'm enjoying the traffic. The car, the. The plane is stuck in this thing. Okay, let me use that as a time to write my poetry or to go through my notes app and look at the poems I used to write about these guys. You know, like, make it an enjoyable process. Tell jokes, tell funny stories. Ask each other interesting questions. Go deeper into yourself. Start to formulate what your dream girl would look like. Like, enjoy everything. And when you enjoy things, you're less attached to it, needing to be forever. Circling back to the beginning, that inner good girl in us, she meets someone, she's like, oh, my God, if this isn't forever, I'm gonna die. I can't deal with a heartbreak again. Like, please, God, no. And the whole time you're with the person, you're so fearful about losing them. And the magnetic person knows. People come in and out of my life. The only person I'm gonna be with the rest of my days is me. And so anyone that comes in beautiful, let me enjoy my time. Time, you know, and it doesn't mean that she doesn't have a future with people, right? But it means she's actually present to each experience, which is what creates the future rather than, I'm not in, like, I feel like modern dating is that it's so unmagnetic, which is why it's just not working for people. Because it's like, well, do you want to be together forever? I don't know. It depends if you want to be together forever. Well, what are your values and. And visions? Oh, what about. I like fun and playing family and. Oh, me too. Maybe we can do forever. It's like, do you guys even like each other? Do you guys even have fun? Do you guys even like how each other smell like. Do you guys even like the same music? Like, do you. Would you be friends? And it's again, this role playing because we're all looking for someone to save us. We're all looking for a guarantee for safety forever, for the future. It doesn't exist around this planet called Earth. But do you know what we can do while we're here? Listen to music, eat good food, dance, play epic poems and watch amazing movies and run in flower fields and swim with wild dolphins. Guys, next week, did I tell you this? I'm. You saw the Lamori episode. I'm assuming it's wild dolphins next week in the ocean. This has been a lifelong dream of mine, ever since the Lisa Frank folders I had, the dolphins one. I mean, if you're, if you're a 90s girl, you're a dolphin girl. It was. It's just in us. So this is the shit I'm on, you know, what about you? What are you doing with your. With your free life that you have in this lifetime? Because we're all free. And it's this illusion we have of like, I need to wait until I can. You can start having the most magnificent, enjoyable life right now. But it comes from you going through these, these seven steps, stepping into your shadows, feeling the feels, doing the triple E method, sitting through the discomfort, and then you're freed of it. It's no longer this boogeyman under your bed, but rather now you can look at it face to face and say, I'm not afraid of you. And so this is exactly what my new book is about. Maybe this love story is really about me. So I feel like I talked about it so much, I'm like, how can I make a pre order link to have it below. If I have it, it will be down there. If not, you'll see it soon. Be sure to subscribe to this podcast because I'm going to be speaking about this a lot more. I'm seeing so many women go through this journey, and it's really the journey of a lifetime. It's like the ultimate initiation. And on the other side awaits your most magnetic, alluring, seductive, fun, joyful, pleasurable version of you. And so this is how you become your most magnetic self. Be sure to subscribe, comment, tell me any other topics you would love for future solo casts, and I'm super excited to continue to weave with you on this journey. Have a beautiful rest of your day. So trust your intuition, trust your inner wisdom, trust your inner guidance.