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A
All right, so I guess this is really happening now, guys. Of all the. Andrew, we've done a lot of stunts on this show, particularly during TVTLON weeks. Where do you rank this one so far? As far as, I don't know. Worst idea.
B
It feels really bad right now. Tbtl.
A
Well, all right. Hello, good morning and welcome, everyone, to a very special Monday edition of TBTL show that just might be too beautiful to live. My name is Luke Burbank. I am your host. Here we are in the rented. John, what is this? Toyota.
C
Nissan Pathfinder. Nissan.
A
Nissan Pathfinder. Heading on out to Valley City, Ohio, for the final time this week as part of episode 4774 in a collector series. We're in the afterglow of the tbtl a thon. And we are in the before glow of a frog jump. Can you be Andrew in the beforeglow of a frog jump?
B
I think you can be. The question is, do you want to be?
A
Could be. But should you be?
B
That is the question. Just because you can doesn't mean you should. But here we are in the shadow of. Of Frog Day.
A
We sure are. We are heading from the Airbnb, which is in Ohio City, which is a neighborhood of Cleveland. I found that name slightly confusing, to be honest with you.
B
Because it's a state.
A
Because it's a state. Because it'd be like a neighborhood of Seattle called Seattle City. Seattle.
B
Well, it'd be like Washington City, even more confusing.
A
But we are leaving Ohio City. We are heading out to Valley City for the final time. How are we feeling on this? We're recording this on a Sunday, of course, the day of the frog jump. Andrew, how are you feeling?
B
I'm feeling great. You know, I just had a moment of reflection just literally a second ago as you were talking, realizing that if we've accomplished one thing, one thing during this week of the tbtl, a thon, it's that you are officially calling it Valley City and not Valley Center, Ohio. A struggle of mine that I've been, I don't know, burdening with for 10 years now. You always call it Valley center, and I think. I think you got it now. It's Valley City.
A
I did have to write it on the show sheet every day. I'm not kidding. Because I felt like the people, the good people of Valley City and more broadly, Liverpool Township, they deserved me describing the city accurately, the town accurately. And I knew that if I didn't write it down, I would call it Valley Center. What is exactly the scoop with that? We're at the Liverpool Township Community center, which is also your former elementary school. But we're in Valley City. What's exactly the layout out there?
B
I didn't really know this until we were looking it up while we were driving the other day, but I guess Valley City is inside Liverpool Township, not the other way around. That's my understanding.
A
But Liverpool Township is not a county.
B
No. Did I say county?
A
No, but I'm just. I'm trying to understand what township means. Valley City is a city or a town.
B
Valley City, I believe, is an unincorporated census designation area.
A
A very good place.
B
Sorry, I didn't mean to get so sexy so early in the morning.
A
I'm just trying to lean into the fact that you can hear how late we were out last night in my voice. I'm trying to make it a feature, not a bug. Yes, but no.
B
I believe I used the word burdening a little bit ago. That's living in my head, too. I'm still in that phase of waking up where I try to remember what words mean. Corrine, this is for you.
A
Again, I'm not trying to belabor this, and I'm not trying to be burdening you with this too much, Andrew, but, like, I understand what a town is, I understand what a county is. I even on occasion understand what a state is. But the city of Valley City, Ohio, being in the township of Liverpool, being in the county of Medina.
B
Yes.
A
What layer, what. What fascia is Liverpool Township?
B
I mean, I really think this is a question for the Daves. And when I say the Daves, of course, I mean the frogs who live in a pond there. But I don't know, there, I guess, isn't there?
A
What if. I will not allow the frog jump to go forward until I get some answers on this?
B
I want some answers. We roll up.
A
At long last, I throw myself down on the parachute target, which I believe is what the frogs will be jumping on. Some kind of a parachute thing, and say I demand answers.
B
Well, can we actually let me shift here because I have no answers for you about the layers of government, but I do have a lot of question anxieties about what we're getting into here as far as the actual. I mean, we've been talking about it in very broad terms, but to be honest with you, I haven't drilled down the specifics of what we're actually walking into because I've been pretty nervous about this whole thing.
A
I would say, honestly, hands off doesn't even begin to describe it.
B
I would say delinquent in our lack of preparation for what we're driving into,
A
I would say professionally unprofessional.
B
Mm. Yeah. So just putting aside all of the other hullabaloo that will be going on, like I have, that's what I really
A
want to talk about with you in a moment is the hullabaloo. Is the hullabaloo as it specifically relates to you. Because there are going to be a lot of people, a lot of friends, both old and more recently made. Boy, I'm burdening myself, too, with language this morning. You've got a lot of people coming out to this, Andrew, from the olden times, some people you haven't seen in many years, also people you met more recently. But, like, this is going to be a pretty big social event for you.
B
It is. And you know me, I love social events, especially when it mixes people from various aspects of my life, especially when there's an aspect of it in which I'm going to be performing in some way. Now, performing is a very strong word here, but there is a moment where the three of us. Now keep in mind, most people enter. I believe the official rules say one person takes one frog. One person and one frog enter, one frog leaves. Well, the circle.
A
If I could just. If I could clarify, and I don't mean to gender this, but I believe maybe it was our friend Dave Rako who said, the rules are it's supposed to be one person, but sometimes if three young girls want to bring one frog in, we let it happen.
B
Right. That's been living in my head, too.
A
So we. We are essentially three young girls.
B
That's what I've been described. That.
C
We're often described that way. I think.
A
Yes, actually, that SEO might not hurt us, John, if you could put that in for the, like, the giggle squad. If we could get more people looking for three young girls hosting the podcast and they find. So, yes, we are going to be, I'm sure, looking somewhat, let's just say, amateurish as we, the three of us, bring our one Dave into the frog jump arena. And here's the other problem. I do not want to scare our frog. You know how we've been on a thing this week about wanting to be as humane with the Dave as possible. I was talking to somebody about this yesterday out at the sort of location, and they said, well, people get out there, they put their frog down, and then some days, like, they kind of smack the ground or they kind of yell at the frog. Yeah, I don't want us to yell at the frog.
B
Yeah. I know. We got it. We got to be encouraging without being cruel.
C
Gently cajoling, just hey, buddy, you could do it kind of thing.
A
I'm saying I want to go with positive reinforcement.
B
I like this.
A
That actually gets me to another thought about this, which is under no circumstances are we allowed to win the frog jump. That would be the worst look ever.
B
I gotta say, when we started this week, I thought, there's nothing more than I want. There's nothing I want more than to.
A
Unburden yourself, sir.
B
Unburden yourself. There's nothing I want more than to win the frog drag. Really. But I think that was just a notion, like a bit. But you're right. First of all, as far as a bit is concerned, that's kind of a bad bit. Way bad, I think. But also, there's just no way. I don't even want to touch the frog. And I don't want to yell at the fr. And I don't want to stamp around the frog. I actually just want to. I want to Walden this. I want to take our frog and go out into the woods somewhere while you guys all hang out at the frog jump festival.
A
I'm totally fine with that. Honestly. Like, I just want to get through this now.
B
That's where I'm at.
A
I want. I want to take our Dave out. Lovingly fun. Sometimes I want to place our. I. I think three out of three Daves agree. They like. They like where we're. What we're thinking here. Because I'd say we. We gently place our Dave on the middle of the jumping ring. We give it a thumbs up and then we just back away and we just keep. How's that for Mamba Mentality.
B
We just homer our way into that
A
nearest the heart of a champion.
B
Yes.
A
And then we go sit in the pavilion with the tens and call it a day.
B
How's that sound? This will be my flu game. I'll have one of one.
A
Famously against the Boston Celtics. As I was. Let's talk a little bit about yesterday. We can't look forward without looking back. We had such a fun time in the cleave. We were hanging out with our friend, your friend, and now our friend Jessica and Camille and a host of other people at the Guardians game. Our buddy Bobby rolled through. That was such a fun afternoon into evening where the Guardians had a thrilling comeback against the Pittsburgh Pirates. The Seattle Mariners on the far west end of the continent were also coming back heroically. I don't know if I've had a more fun Saturday night in A while, guys.
B
That was a very big win last night. I know this is not a Guardians podcast yet, but after last night, we might be tracking in that direction. That was such a fun night. The Guardians were. I mean, it was. First of all, we only went to one of the games, but it ended up being a double header yesterday because of various weather and smoke conditions in the atmosphere. And then the game we went to see was the second game of that, and that was delayed because of a very heavy rainstorm. And so we were kind of wandering around, kind of a. Kind of taking a walking tour of an area that I grew up in. You guys got to lay eyes on Walsh Manufacturing, where I. Where I cut my teeth in the industry. Lou.
A
I've now established a direct, unilateral communication line with Bob Walsh.
B
Yeah, we don't know how we feel about that.
A
You're no longer involved. I don't need you anymore. He's in my contacts. I'm sending him photos. He's liking them. He's saying he might need to add it to the TBTL shrine in the basement.
B
He's calling you son.
A
He did call John Johnny.
C
He. Yeah, it's true. When we left his house the other day, he called me Johnny. And I know you don't love it, Andrew, but the way he used to call you Andy. And I felt like I have a new dad. Brother.
B
He does. I'm glad that you like that. That is one thing. I kind of forgot about this. And I say this with all love, but growing up, that was something that I found kind of embarrassing. Would be somebody would introduce themselves to my father and he would immediately nickname them. He'd put an A Y to the end of their name. And I would often say, well, that's not the name they just gave you.
C
I felt very honored and even more so because I never heard Luki.
B
That's a good point. Are you jealous?
A
Well, that's why I've been sending him various photos and other text messages, trying to get into his especially good graces, because nothing would warm my heart like a good Luki from Bob Walsh.
B
Yeah, understood. Yeah. So back to what we're getting into, I guess, is we have. We have the actual frog jump event that is going to happen sometime between, we're assuming, 1 and 1:30.
A
We are in flight 17.
B
How much that's worth. I just opened a bottle of water between my leg and it now looks like I had an accident in the car seat. So hopefully that dries up before I start to see people here in Valley City. But aside from that, if we can.
A
Andrew, again, I don't want to. Again, I don't want to get stuck on this, but I know that you, again, are going to be. There's some folks from your growing up days. Right. And also maybe extended family and things like that. You're going to be pretty on today. Have you been getting in the zone this morning? Have you been thinking about this?
B
No. In fact, I find when I'm stressed out, I do. I actually.
A
I was making it worse. I'm not trying to.
B
No. I wouldn't say I'm self destructive, but one of my least favorite qualities about myself is sometimes when I'm really stressed out about something, I tend to take myself to some sort of astral plane by like scrolling through social media. Like, I haven't been thinking about it a lot because it is, it is like, you know, it is a. It's gonna be a strange situation. I mean, any TBTL event where you're, you know, you're gonna be meeting and re meeting a bunch of people that only know you through the podcast. It's always fun. But you'll, I think, have my back on this, Luke, that there is a certain amount of sort of anxiety about remembering people's names and being present.
A
Oh, I meant to ask if someone would bring name tags.
B
Oh, yeah, well, I'm Andrew.
A
I forgot about that.
B
This is Johnny.
A
Let me make a mnemonic device.
C
I feel like I should have brought the name tags.
A
Johnny like the cab in Blade Runner. And Andrew like the robot. In short, Andy like the man.
B
Yes, grill. Exactly. And I'm wearing my grills, so that can hopefully help with the mnemonic device. Yeah. So there will be both tens here.
A
I have heard there are tens that are already there.
B
Yeah, I know.
A
That's on Instagram. This morning, as I was kind of getting ready for the day, I was looking at our Instagram feed and I saw that people were already posting photos from there.
B
Yeah. That gave me a ping of anxiety,
A
a pang of happiness. Oh, wait, yes.
B
Yeah, no, I am happy. Listen, we're doing the show. I do not want to make like, people who are showing up for this feels not the case. But I am who I am, as Olive Oil once famously said. I think it was Bluto. I think it was. I'm sorry, it's Bluto. And so I am. It is going to be an interesting mix of both. It's going to be a TBTL meetup. It's going to be a frog jump
A
competition, which I have A lot riding on Kelsey on Kelshi.
B
Yeah, yeah. A lot of investment there. And then there will be some immediate family in that. My parents will be there and I've heard some exceptions. Extended family is showing up and I've heard from a childhood friend who I have not seen, I think since grade school, who connected with me. Tim. I'm very excited to see Tim again, but I always assumed when I someday see Tim again, we would be able to actually catch up, maybe sit down, have a cup of coffee or something. But instead it'll be sort of wedged between a lot of different sort of, I don't know, sort of social obligations
A
pulling me in different events and also, let's just say public facing events.
B
Sure. Yeah. So anyway, so these are the things that are stewing around in my brain.
A
Okay. John, how are you feeling? Are you nervous about seeing old friends?
C
No, the only, I mean, I'm excited. There's a few tens, I, like you said posting and I'm excited to see folks and meet some folks for the first time. I'm excited to see your parents, Andrew. I say this sincerely. We've seen them a few times this week and they're just such lovely, kind people. So it'll be nice to see them one more time before saying goodbye, before you're hanging out of town tomorrow. And so that'll be fun to spend some time with them. But it is also, it's this big event. There's a lot going on, there's a lot of people and you know, we will be focused on our Dave. And so I'm not, I don't think I'm like nervous or anxious. I just am preparing myself for like it's gonna be a big day kind of thing.
B
I don't think of you as getting nervous around these things. They seem like you, you just seem like a natural social being.
A
Gregarious is the word that comes to mind.
C
I'm very much an extrovert, but it still is, I think it's kind of what you're saying, Andrew. It's like especially. And again, this is not criticism. I'm legitimately thrilled to like meet a lot of tens and stuff. But I, I want to put my best foot forward. You know, I am representative of the podcast and, and, and working with you guys. And I want 10, the tens especially who are coming to have the best experience they can. And so I don't want to like you guys know me, I sometimes put my foot in the mouth and say something stupid and I just want.
B
Those are Listeners. Feet you put in your mouth. And we've. We. How many conversations do we have to have about that, exactly?
C
And so I just want to make sure I'm being appropriate, not doing anything to embarrass myself or embarrass the show. And, you know, so it's just. It's exciting, but just, you know, gotta be on. Gotta be on best behavior and make sure everything goes well.
A
Andrew, would you say that your. Is your dad a hugger? I'm not a hugger because I gave him a hug the other day. He went in for the handshake, and I gave him a hug, and I kind of. That's been living in my head. I don't know if I crossed a line.
C
That's why you're not Luki. Because he goes for the handshake, I go for the handshake. Now, Joyce, she goes for the hug, and I appreciate that.
B
That's my stepmom.
A
I picked Joyce up. Yeah, I picked her up and spun around in a circle, huh?
C
Yeah.
A
Yeah.
C
Interesting choice.
B
Well, so you asked me if my dad's a hugger. I do know he's a hugger for family, for sure. I think hugs are important to him.
A
So the fact that he didn't offer the hug to me means I'm still not in the circle of trust.
B
Well, we'll see. But I think that maybe he would follow other people's lead. I think that maybe he was also wondering maybe in his head, is this a hugging situation? Because I think, don't you, like, we're the first generation where you're, like, hugging friends a lot? Just sort of like. Like, I don't know. Does my dad's generation, were they, like, when they were in their 20s and 30s, were they hugging their friends hello? I'm gonna say no.
A
No. I don't see the greatest generation doing a lot of. They weren't hugging when they stormed Omaha Beach.
B
Okay.
A
But weirdly, depending on what part of Italy they're from, they were almost fully making out.
C
Yeah, sure.
A
It went from like, we're kissing each other on the face as male friends to the least physical contact possible to us, the hugging generation.
B
I would just like to point out that my dad was born, I believe, maybe in the very last year of World War II. Just. He's not greatest generation.
A
All right, well, I don't know his life. I don't know his business.
B
Well, now you know that much more about him.
A
Okay, so he was born in an amphibious vehicle just off of Omaha Beach.
B
Appropriate for frog Hop. Day.
A
Yes, yes, that's right. That's right. Actually, you know, we found out. I found out from Jim, one of the people running the. One of the few people not named Dave. Running the frog jump.
B
Weirdly, his nickname is Dave.
A
Just to make it easy, you know, there's this giant fiberglass frog that is now sort of sitting down at the park where we're gonna be, and they had it made by a guy whose entire specialty is making giant frogs for the Marines. Because that's a whole, like, nickname kind of vibe for the Marines who do the amphibious stuff. They're called frogs because they do the land and sea kind of stuff. So they were trying to figure out for years who can make us an enormous frog. And it turns out there's a dude in Ohio who's been making these for the Marines, and they got him to make a giant one for Valley City, Ohio, in Liverpool Township.
C
You mean it's like they have these frogs at Marine bases, or if you are a veteran, you are a Marine, you have one at your house.
A
I think it's more like maybe at, like, where the Marines are, you know,
C
the training centers, the bases, all that kind of stuff.
A
Something like that.
B
Although the idea Trojan frog, it was hollow.
A
I did knock on it. It also smelled a little weird. I did a whole interview on Friday next to the new frog. It kind of was off gassing some. They literally put it up on, like, Wednesday. And I don't think it's fully settled in yet that the. The big frog is the sort of next iteration of a smaller but still kind of large cement frog. The guy who was the local frog jump champ and a very important person in the world of Valley City frog jumping was in, I want to say, like, a skiing accident or maybe it was a car accident and he was laid up, and the town decided the way to make him feel better was for all of the local dudes to get together and pour a giant frog out of concrete and put it in his yard while he was convalescing. And then people would come from far and wide to see the concrete frog.
B
This sounds like a prank.
A
And then eventually the concrete frog started to deteriorate. And now, I think, is, you know, completely, like, crumbled. So this is now the next sort of version or generation of what started out. What a weird way to try to make a guy feel better.
B
It's interesting.
A
Hey, sorry about your crocodile car accident. Here's an enormous concrete frog in your yard that you're just gonna have to deal with for the next 30 to 40 years.
B
Do you remember earlier this week when you were wondering if I was testing a stone frog to see if it was breathing?
A
Yes, I do remember that.
B
That was an interesting moment in our relationship.
A
Can I. Do you mind, Andrew, if I describe
B
it from my perspective, it almost must be that way.
A
So there, you know, there are frogs everywhere in this town. I mean, they've really embraced it. Although I did ask Jim at one point. So were there a lot of frogs? Is that how the frog jump came about? He goes, not particularly. It was three guys at the bar. Literally. We're like, what are we gonna do with this town? I don't know. Frog jump.
B
This is making sense. But.
A
So they've got frog stuff everywhere, including in the room at the community center where we were doing the show this week. And there was like a kind of a. How would you describe it? Like a pottery kind of a frog, like made out of, I don't know, some sort of ceramic.
B
It looked like stone, but it was actually hollow. I remember somebody picked it up later in the week and said, whoa, I thought this was gonna be heavier.
A
John is also very strong.
B
Yeah, that is true.
A
It was heavy to the rest of
B
us and it was the size of what, let's say a basketball. I mean, frog shaped. It wasn't round and orange and rubber. I wanna be very clear.
A
It was no jimothy.
B
No, it was no jimothy. But it was like. It looks like it's stone, but like you said, you know, it was hollow on the inside. And it had a very thin slit of a mouth. Yes, right, Yep.
A
Oddly enough, it just had the, you know, they had decided the only sort of what orifice, like the eyes were, you know, were sort of solid. Everything else they just had cut this very, very narrow slit for its mouth which kind of went all the way across its little frog face.
B
Like you could put a dime in there if it were piggy banked. Only the slot is very, very long.
A
Perfect description. Thank you. And. And while we were sort of talking, I think maybe after the show, I think this maybe had happened a couple times. You had sort of. We were chatting about something and you were kind of running, as I remember it, maybe like the back of your fingernails. What I thought was like along the mouth opening of the. Of the ceramic frog. And for some reason in my brain, I thought you were checking if it was breathing. That's what I thought was going on.
B
What was going on when I started yelling, Clear.
A
Yeah, you defibbed it like two to three times. Exactly.
B
That's definitely when things got interesting. No, I mean, it's one of those moments where I kind of don't realize that I'm fiddling with something.
C
I'm nervous.
B
I wasn't nervous in the moment, but I'm just, you know, like, I'm sitting in the passenger's seat here in this car right now, and, like, if we weren't recording, I'd probably be, like, messing around with these air conditioning vents. Or I'm just always just sort of exploring things with my hands. Another reason why you guys are a little bit leery about me being around listeners, if I understand it correctly. And so I would say don't check if they're breathing.
A
Well, we can assume they are.
B
Oh, no. It's going to be an exciting frog jump. And so I think that what I was doing without thinking about it was just sort of like sticking my fingernails maybe in the slot to see, like, is that actually a slot? Is it pain? I don't know exactly what I was doing because I wasn't paying attention to it, to myself. You know what I mean? That is one aspect. And I don't think I am. I don't think I get this from anybody else in my life. And maybe it's because we are content creators and so you are always looking for content out of our interactions.
A
I'm always looking for ways to get you more in your head.
B
Yeah, well, that is true. That is true. There are things now in my life now we're getting pretty far away from frog jump talk here, but there are things in my life that I continue to do that I never even noticed. I really did before until you pointed out to me, one of which is, like, how I will tear paper towels into small little pieces. And then I think about that.
A
No, no, not in a bad way, Andrew. I think about that a lot because somebody said, I don't know on some social media, and it really resonated with me. I have the paper towel habits of a much richer person, and that is me. Like, I am really not as careful as I should be. I grew up in a no paper towel household because I think my folks were, you know, felt like it was, you know, we have rags we can use for things and we'll wash them or maybe we won't.
B
And that's better for the environment.
A
It is, it is. It's funny, like, my parents and Becca's parents did a lot of similar things, but for wildly different reasons. Like, she grew up watching public television because her parents knew that it was Better for their brains. We grew up watching it because my parents thought everything else was satanic or like, we, you know, we used a lot of towels and not paper towels because we were too cheap to have paper towels. They did it because. Carbon footprint. Sure, Stuff like that. But I think about how you are with paper towels, which is you're not wasteful with them. And I actually really admire that. Like, if you need about half of a paper towel, you'll use that and then. And you'll fold up the leftover half and you'll sort of place it. You'll snug it into the paper towel holder or somehow with. So that the next time you need a paper towel, you'll go grab that
B
half of a towel. If we have a roll of paper towels and they're not on a holder, which is not. We do not have a holder in our kitchen. It's just a roll of paper towels that always sits on the kitchen counter, like, kind of standing up on the kitchen counter. That leaves a hole in the top. Right. And so I will take a paper towel. And the thing is, and this is where I'm a fool, is I'm often like. Like using like, half a paper towel just to blow my nose or really even quarter of a paper towel. Should I be going in the other room and grabbing tissues? Absolutely, I should be. Am I? No. So I will often.
A
Critically, you're not using a handkerchief because that is disgusting.
B
I take a handkerchief and then I put it back in the paper towel roll when I'm done with it, and it sticks. It's nice. But yeah, so I'm often like, just like, yeah, you having literally maybe a quarter of a paper towel like that. I want to reuse again later. So I will just sort of take my fingers and sort of tuck that right into the top of the roll. And I never realized I did that. Do it. And then, by the way, shout out to Bronnie. When we were kids, paper towels were one size, a full paper towel. Then time went on and they kind of had like a half paper towels. You could tear off a half one. Brawny now has something called Terra Square. I'm sure you guys are familiar with this. I only buy Brawny Terra Square paper towels now because they are made. They're perforated for exactly what I do do. They're like, they're. Each paper towel is really. Can be torn up into quadrants, which is perfect for me. And anyway, you pointed that out one time we were sharing an Airbnb and you're like, you have a really interesting paper towel system. Never even realized I was doing it. And now I do it all the time. And, I mean, I continue to do it, and I think, huh. What would Luke think of this?
A
I actually have found myself doing that occasionally, Andrew, because it makes. It makes sense. Have I told you about the paper towel holder that changed the course of my life?
B
No. What do we think about the sheriff's car that's pulling?
A
We don't like it. We don't like it one bit.
C
He's, like, in a parking lot. He's not actually. It's like. For the record, we're not being pulled over. I just.
B
Yes.
C
I'm not gonna run this yellow light, though. I'm gonna stay here.
B
Do you think he's going into Gibbs butcher block where we stopped to get some sandwiches the other day?
A
If he is, I would like him to do a much better job parking.
C
He is weirdly on the side.
A
He looks like he's doing a speed trap. Except the problem is, uh. Oh, he just. He just lit up his lights.
C
See, I'm glad I didn't go on that yellow, even though I could have probably.
B
Are either one of you guys holding? Do we have to ditch anything?
A
No. Wait a minute. Hold on. Let me check this paper towel.
B
I don't like this. He pulled over. Yeah. I think you can go.
A
We have a green light and a green light arrow.
B
Keep the microphone low.
A
But the fact is there is a sheriff's suv. He's just doing traffic control out there. He's about to. I saw him getting his, like, what do you call it? Sort of luminescent vest.
C
The high vis vest.
A
His high vis vest. He's just. But isn't that interesting? We're all grown people of a certain age, as far as I know. No active warrants, behaving legally. And yet that sheriff pulling over and putting his lights on sent an absolute chill through all of us. John was like, am I allowed to go left on a green and a green right?
B
A green arrow?
A
The answer is yes, but I'm with you. That was stressful. The paper towel holder. That changed the course of my life. And I'll have to be a little general here, but when I was much younger and was in a relationship with somebody. I'm talking long, long ago, but a relationship that had the potential to become very serious. I was at this person's apartment, and they had a paper towel holder that was like a goose. Mm. And like. You know what I mean? It was like wood, and it Was kind of like a. I don't know if it was like a goose's body or neck. It was kind of real country kitchen.
B
Yeah, that's what I was gonna say. Country kitsch. Yeah.
A
And I remember we were having a conversation, and I was looking at that paper towel holder, and I thought, this can't be my life. I can't build a life around country kitsch. And that relationship did not go much further. And, you know, I've lived the life that I've lived on a sort of a real jingle all the doors way because of that. Because of that goose paper towel holder.
B
And ironically, you now have a goose paper towel.
A
Oh, I love it.
B
Now I'm back to it. First century kitchen. Yeah, 100%.
A
I mean, I love it, but you. I didn't love it for me back then.
B
Sure. Yeah. Well, it shows the capacity to change and grow also.
A
And I know I've told this story also had a different relationship, different person, and over sandal choices.
B
Oh, this does ring a bell.
A
Yeah, just, you know, some sandals that were being worn and the thought, I don't know if I can build a life with those sandals either. So anyway. Explains why my personal life has been such a success in the relationship department.
B
Are we coming up on your special house here, Luke? You get excited every time we come this route.
A
I mean, not the way John does about fire hydrants.
B
No, I mean, nobody does, but.
A
Nobody does.
C
In my defense. You know what? I don't need to defend myself. I know I'm right. There's some weirdly placed fire hydrants.
B
Oh, we got an answer to that, by the way. Somebody wrote in something about us. Tell John Sklaroff. This is from a listener. Tell John Sklaroff that when the county, or was it the township?
A
We'll never know until I interrupt this frog jump.
B
But somebody did want to let you know that when they're installing water lines, they need a whole bunch of those because of pressure. Maybe because of pressure or, like, maybe the ability to release pressure or something. But basically, when they're installing a line, it just makes sense to install a whole bunch of hydrants along that line.
C
Well, I appreciate that as an explanation, and that's great. It seems so random to have these in a field. Fire hydrants. But if there's a. A logical explanation, I accept that, and thank you to the listener who sent that in.
A
Now, the house that I've been getting very excited about is, to me, quite interesting. It's a beautiful old brick kind of, you might almost say, mansion but it has a specific roof style where the. The normal edge of a roof where you'd have like a rain gutter and stuff. It's all very rounded. It has like a really feels like the Hobbit or the Shire. And it's a beautiful home that somebody I'm sure put a lot of time, effort and money into building. What I find so fascinating about it is that it is being completely subsumed. Is that a word? It's being taken over by like weeds and blackberries and things. Like it's in full disrepair. But again, at some point, somebody put a lot of money and time and thought into this beautiful home that then has now been sort of abandoned and has been taken over by vine.
B
Can I share this note that I got from the listener? It's coming from the 440-area-code, by the way. So, you know, it's like nearby.
C
Is this more fire hydrant talk?
B
Yeah, it is. I got sick of the Hobbit house talk. So we're back to fire hydrants where the real action is. I don't know this person's name, but it says, hi, Andrew. Greetings from two hours west, AKA the epicenter of the cyclosporiasis outbreak. I happen to be driving by this wheat field. There's a photo attached. As you guys were talking about hydrants in the middle of nowhere, let John know that rural fire hydrants are there so that utility company can flush the water lines. They have to periodically open the hydrants and wash out accumulated rust. It's amazing how wrong I got this. And wash out accumulated rust and whatnot to preserve flow and make sure the residential antimicrobial chemicals stay in the water until it reaches your tap.
C
So. So that's really interesting.
A
By the way, accumulated rust sounds like a band that would open for Dave
C
Matthews or a Neil Young album. I. That's a really interesting answer. Again, thank you listener and I. You know, if you guys recall, I lived in r rural New York for about seven years in a very isolated kind of rural place in a small town.
A
And we did as you were telling those kids on the farm, right? When you're trying to be like, I'm
C
cool, I get it, but we, we didn't have those around us. And so I now worry for the water.
B
Think about all the microbes, the rust
A
accumulation off the charts, Canton, New York
C
and their water supply.
A
By the way, the 440 area code serves the north and northeastern suburbs of Cleveland, along the with nearby communities of Lake Lorain, Ashtabula and Geauga Counties.
B
You know, this was a big deal. So growing up, the whole area was 216. Right. The Cleveland area code. And then they introduced 3, 3, 0, and then I think later 440, but maybe three 3, 0 and 4, 4, 0 around the same time. That was really big. That was world shaking to us. Because you realize that something so structural can change so quickly.
A
Yeah, I am hanging on to my 3, 1, 0.
B
Yeah, that's a good one.
A
No one guess the rest of my cell phone, please. We now know we've narrowed it down to 3,1 0, but that was also. That's like an Ogla number.
B
Yeah.
A
That I don't think they're giving out anymore.
B
Yeah, I wish I had a 206 in Seattle. I actually have a. I'm a 603 because I got my cell phone in New Hampshire.
A
Well, let's see here we are now getting pretty close. What are we, about seven minutes out? So I think we need to get in the zone here, people. And by that I mean figure out what the parking situation is.
B
Exactly.
A
This is gonna be a bit. Everybody in the town turns out for this and I don't know what it's gonna look like. So maybe we sign off for this portion of the broadcast and I guess we'll rejoin folks when we're out on the.
B
Yeah, you wanna talk about this quickly?
A
So the plan for this.
B
So the plan is for me, like right now, I'm wearing a pair of headphones. I've got this little machine we're recording into. I got two microphones plugged into it. When the time comes, all three of us are gonna be out there. I hate to say it possibly like doofuses because usually this is one just
A
like three seven year old girls with pigtails bringing our froggy out.
B
You want me recording out in the. In the arena, Right. I'm the man in the arena.
A
Yeah.
B
Is this the plan? Because you look different, but that is the plan. So you guys imagine a person who
A
doesn't know what the context is for why I just said that to you,
B
which is probably most people. Yeah. If we're being honest. But that is the plan. We want to try to get audio from inside the arena. So. So I'm. That's gonna both make me look a little bit even more doofusy.
A
But if that's gonna make you embarrass you, you don't have to do that
B
because Also gives me a job though.
A
CBS television will have me mic'd up.
B
Yeah.
A
But it might also Be audio from them.
B
It might make me look like I have something to do with my hands. I think that if I don't have it, I'm just gonna not know what to do. So I think maybe I will kind of almost hide, you know, when I'm at the beach. And I don't want to think about that. The fact that my shirt is off in public, I can take off my glasses. And I feel. I think that maybe having this rig might make me. Might take me out of myself a little bit.
A
Whatever you need to feel comfortable, John. Same goes for you. Thank you. I am, I guess, assuming that I'll hold the frog because I was the one who did it last time.
B
Sure, yeah. The frog already knows you.
C
I don't mind, but I do like that they have a com. Dave has comfortability with you.
A
Luke is comfortable with you. Yeah. He'll be like, I recognize this smell of this hand. So, yeah, so that's the plan. We're gonna. We're gonna get there, we're gonna get settled in, we're gonna probably say hi to the tens, and then we're gonna be on standby to get our frog and get out there and try to lose this contest.
B
All right, let's lose.
A
Classic TBTL energy. Five foot seven.
B
Five feet, seven inches. Next up, Morgan Silverstone. RIP. We are here. We are at the frog jump, and we are waiting in line for Flight 17.
A
This is oddly stressful. Like, I mean, there's absolutely nothing on the line. Why do I feel like I'm worried this isn't going to go well?
B
I am very stressed out right now. By the way, we have. How many listeners would you say here so far? About 20?
C
Yeah, 20. 20 sounds right.
A
And about 20 strangers I've introduced myself to who are not tens, who didn't take it particularly well.
B
More on that later when we get into the details of how you traumatized a woman and her daughter.
C
I'm nervous. Everyone in the. In the line around us has children with them, and we don't. Do we need to go borrow a child for this?
A
I don't think we want to use the term borrow a child here at this festival.
B
Yeah.
C
That's reasonable.
A
Okay. But. But as we were saying in the car, we. We don't want to, like, startle or scare our frog, but it also means our frog may just stay there inert.
C
Yeah.
A
So three grown men with a non moving frog. What could go wrong?
B
This is going to be weird. This is definitely going to be memorable for everybody here.
A
And I think we just made the last minute decision, Andrew, to not bring the TBTL audio recording equipment out onto the pitch because that might make the CBS shot look weird. So it's gonna be one of those things where I guess we stop the recording right before the important moment and then we'll just jump back on afterwards and tell everybody how it went.
B
I like the use of the word jump there. I like that you're embracing the culture.
A
What do we think is the best case and worst case scenario for us about what is about to happen?
B
I think none of, I think the worst case scenario is also what's going to happen, which is the three of us are going to sort of stand around and look at the frog and sort of talk to it gently and see if it jumps. Now, we've been checking this out, we've been watching the frog and the way it works is you really are supposed to like, people are yelling at their frogs, people are throwing their hands down next to the frog and we don't want to do that.
A
I got the other update from Madison. Who is the frog handler? Also somebody who started out catching these frogs when she was five years old and now is a graduate. She graduated from college with a degree in biology, emphasis on frogs. And she's about to go to veterinarian school. Here's what she said. Cover the frog's eyes. No, no, no. So that they don't get stressed out. So we kind of want to cover the frog's eyes, place the frog down gently on the, on the corner horse, if you will, and then just maybe rub its back a little bit. She's actually said,
B
oh, you're in front of us.
A
We're gonna, we're gonna lead it off for you.
B
Oh, you're leading off. You're 17. You guys are 17.
A
Shows how it's done.
B
This guy, he's doing it great.
A
But supposedly if we put the frog down and then maybe gently rub its back, she said that that might be make a jump. So that's going to be our approach, I think. You know what I'm realizing why I'm having such a weird feeling is because we are the only adults doing this
B
and there's three of us and we're large men.
A
Speak for yourself. Like, yeah, I know, I know I said Andrew. I know I said, John, don't use the term borrow a child, but you actually might. I mean, some of the tents brought their kids. Should we, should we borrow a kid?
B
Would that be totally abdicating our, our relationship to our listeners?
C
I mean, I Also think we're on side of this fence and they're on the other side of the fence. So I don't know if we could do that at this point.
A
I mean, it would be totally.
B
What if we just had one child out there with us?
A
So that's what I was saying.
B
Oh, I thought you meant we just send a child out there in our stead.
A
No, I mean three large adult men and a child they don't know.
B
My Aunt Jan is here. She's really short. She could maybe.
A
Yeah, absolutely.
B
She could do it.
A
Can we put her in, like, I don't know, some sort of kids outfit and see if anybody notices? All right, so I guess this is really happening now, guys. Of all the. Andrew, we've done a lot of stunts on this show, particularly during TV telethon weeks. Where do you rank this one so far? As far, as, I don't know, worst idea.
B
It feels really bad right now, I gotta be honest. I'm just trying to remind myself that this is just fun and this is going to be a fun memory, and so I should live in the moment as opposed to being as absolutely embarrassed as I am feeling right now.
A
I mean, does it make it worse that this is the town you grew up in as a child and that you have lots of family and old friends here?
B
This would be so much worse in Pittsburgh. No, no, I'm just kidding. No, I. No, it's not even about. I mean, the. Oh, look, Simeon is out in the ring. Simeon the Amphibitant is now in the center of the ring. Is he now the King of the frog jump?
C
He was recruited to be a judge, so we got a man on the inside, which will be helpful.
A
Also out there with, like, a Gandalf staff, which I don't know if that's regulation or not. This is. Things are unraveling quickly.
B
This is really weird. All right, I'm gonna stop recording now. We're gonna check back in later on this afternoon or this evening.
A
You know, the energy that I need you all, both of you, to really channel right now. Ribbit, Five foot eight and three quarters. Five, eight and three quarters.
B
Next to TPTL with Dave.
A
Okay, ready?
B
All right, ready.
A
You got this, Dave. Ready?
B
Go. You got it.
A
Go, Dave, go.
B
Okay, that's one. Wait.
A
Come on, Dave. Two. Come on, Dave. One more. One more.
B
One more.
A
You can do it.
C
Yeah.
B
Does that count?
A
Nice job.
B
Where do we get our real fight?
A
How we do 4 foot 3
B
inches. Next up is Skyler Barara with Billy Bon Joro. Melizzi you're on his terrible.
A
4 foot 3. Four feet, three inches, guys. Four feet three. You get what you pay for. You go in to a frog jump as a namby pamby pacifist who wants to praise your frog and build their self esteem, and you get four feet, three inches.
B
Well, listen, we got through it.
A
We did get through it.
B
That's the important thing.
A
That is true.
B
We should mention that I had. I've had a couple of beers in the intervening hours.
A
Two small beers.
B
Ah, two small beers. But what I was gonna say was
A
Andrew is not driving, by the way.
B
John, I am not.
A
Had one unsweetened iced tea and is driving.
C
Yeah, it was unsweetened. Two lemon slices. Slices. Two lemon slices.
B
Okay. Be careful.
A
It's spicy.
B
It's spicy. What I was gonna say was we have not fully examined the tape yet, and there is tape out there of us participating in this frog jump. But I saw one video of us so far, and you know what? I'm proud of how we behaved ourselves. Presented ourselves out there. Like we are on the ground. We are talking to the frog.
A
We went for it.
C
Us.
B
We are. We're all down on our knees, and it. It went so fast. Yeah. They call our name and we're out there, and then it's just like, okay, everybody's watching. I got people that I haven't Talked to in 30 years in the audience. I got family out there. We got tens in the audience. And we are just committed to it. But we're also committed to not being to this frog.
A
That's right.
B
And the three of us got our faces so close, if the tape is to be believed. And again, we're gonna see more angles on this. We're all putting our face very close to the frog. We're all saying very sweet things to it. And then at one point, it's just not jumping at all. It's not jumping at all. And you see, I just take my big fat hand and I just kind of touch the ground next to it a little bit. Other people with their frogs are slamming it. They're using both their hands on each side of the frog. They're yelling, they're screaming. We didn't do that. But you just see me gently go so on the ground. And the frog just jumped a little bit. And you know what? I have no regrets.
A
Also, we didn't even have hardly the worst jump that went to a little girl named AJ Won the award for shortest jump, which was, I believe, six inches. So actually, that would have been Kind of cool. I would have taken shortest jump or longest jump jump. But, you know, we committed to the bit. I do think we had the largest cheering section.
B
Oh, really? I didn't notice that.
A
So in my head, nobody else had, let's say, 15 or 20 of their podcast listeners there.
B
That's a really good point. I have no idea what that was like. I was so just in my head in that moment. I didn't. I mean, I think when we were recording earlier, I said I was going to be out there with my recording kit, but it just seemed like the wrong move, so I ditched my recording.
A
I think that was. I think you made the right call.
B
I just threw it in the grass.
A
I mean, first of all, because, again, we were also filming this for CBS tv, and it would be weird to try to explain why one of the people has their own radio equipment. It just kind of looked a little cleaner this way.
B
Yeah.
A
And. And, yeah, we can explain to everyone sort of what the vibe was. What happened. I was a little worried when I put the frog down, when I put our Dave down, that it was just gonna not jump at all. And we were going to have to resort to some kind of extreme tactics. But eventually, like you said, Andrew, you kind of gently patted the ground and he did a hop. And then I was like, all right, well, at least we've met the minimum threshold for this.
B
Yeah. I didn't know how I felt about the whole thing at all until I saw the video of us out there in the moment. I was just like, I. I was just so discombobulated. I actually would like to go back. The video I saw, I don't think I had the volume up, so I'm excited to hear that. It didn't occur to me.
A
I assume that it us walking in slow motion set to the music battle without dignity or honor from Kill Bill.
B
Or what about the whistling song? Or is that the same one?
A
What's that?
B
What about the whistling song? Or is that the same one? Yeah, I would like to walk out to that, so.
A
Oh, man. That song. Twisted nerve. That song is scary.
B
Twisted nerve. Do you think you are more present in those moments than me, Luke? Like, honestly, I have no. I didn't know what happened until I saw a clip of video of us out there.
A
I don't know if I am more present, but what I was in that specific moment doing was trying to release our frog in the direction that our cameraman, Mike Hernandez, had told me to release the frog. So it wasn't that I was more Present. But it was like, I think I had more things that I needed to
B
remember to do, which seems even the opposite of what I'm saying.
A
Right. So I was probably less present. I was just kind of going through the motions of keep the frog's eyes covered and then uncover them at the last moment, which that allegedly would kind of stir in them the desire to jump. Cause they're kind of, you know, suddenly taking in the world and trying to, again, go in the direction of where our cameras were. Stuff like that. Again, I was just. I was glad the frog jumped. I was glad that also we didn't panic and sell out and scream or yell.
B
Yeah.
A
Cause I could also see myself doing that. I talk a big game about kindness. Kindness and being humane to both people and animals. And then the first second that I feel embarrassed, it's all out the window.
B
Yeah.
A
And that's led. I was explaining to some of the tens who showed up, by the way, shout out to everybody who made the drive out here to Valley City. We even had some folks come all the way in from Indiana looking at you, Aiden and Anna. But I was explaining to them that because of my insecurity, I think most of my bar fighting days was just related to me feeling embarrassed. And that when I told the story of. I think maybe the last actual battle that I had without dignity or honor was Camaro. Kev and I were in an Uber. We went to the rickshaw. We walked into the rickshaw. I got into it with a guy, complete stranger, headbutted him. He fell over. We walked out, got in the same Uber and left. We were in the rickshaw for less than two minutes. And all that is to say, I'm glad that we didn't resort to any kind of cruel tactics just to try to get the thing over with or to, you know, speed it along. We. I felt like we stuck to our morals, such as they are, and. And, yeah, we didn't win, but I thought we handled it with honor.
B
Now, something very shocking happened to me that I have not told you about at this event today, Luke, that I'm trying to tell you about now.
A
Yeah, I'm all.
B
So, as we said, it was a. It was a big mix of people from my life there. I'm there with you guys, who I met, kind of embarrassed about, but I can roll with it. No, I got family there. My mom and dad are there. My stepmom and dad are there. My aunt is there, whatever. And then I also have friends who are there. I have listeners who are there. Some of whom I've met, some of whom I haven't. You know, it's just a big mix of people. One of the people who was there was my friend Tim.
A
I think I saw you talking to him. Do you have a ball cap on?
B
Yeah, I did.
A
Okay.
B
Now, Tim, very fit guy. Yeah. Is. He was a little guy growing up. I have not talked to Tim except for exchanging an email or two. When he found out I had a podcast, like, five years ago, he. He literally stumbled on our podcast because he was just looking for a new podcast to listen to.
A
That must have been totally weird for him to realize it was his friend Andy. Andy Walsh.
B
Yeah. Now, in his defense, I don't think he's a regular listener to the podcast. What he was like, to his credit,
A
he was not interested.
B
Yes. But he did, I think, listen to a little bit. And so he dropped me an email a while back and sent me some photos. I think he heard me talking about my old skateboard or something, and he actually had a photo of it. Anyway, I haven't talked to him in person or really had a chance to really, really, like, talk about our experiences growing up. And we never did it right. Like, since the last time I saw him sometime in. In grade school or high school. And so it was really interesting. I was trying hard not to ignore, like, the listeners who were there and stuff, but I also didn't want to ignore Tim, somebody I hadn't seen in 20 years. And we were reminiscing, and, boy, do we start reminiscing hard. And I have a pretty bad memory, believe it or not, based on I tell you the stories I do remember, and I'm proud when I learned that I got a lot of the details right. But I am the type of person, when I'm talking about high school or something, somebody will say, oh, yeah, I remember so and so. Remember so and so. And I'm like, no, I don't remember that person at all. One of the big reasons I don't want to go to a reunion, by the way, because I just feel like my memory fails me too much on that stuff. So, anyway, Tim and I are kind of going deep. We're remembering our teachers, remembering our classrooms. I'm glad to hear that he's enjoying geeking out on this stuff as much as I do. We're reminding each other of stories, etcetera, and we start talking about our teachers, and we start saying, like, which one did you have in sixth grade? Then we start going backwards. Fifth, fourth. You guys know how Numbers work and yeah, we get back to second grade. We get back to second grade. Does a pretty good burn. You say that on the mic.
C
Yeah, we remember. We know how words.
B
See, I blew it around. Okay, good.
A
Well, there you go. Proof of concept.
B
I believe John said, we know how numbers work. Not so much words. Anyway, so we're in second grade for some reason, and Tim is remembering some specific story or something. He said, you know, and you had your panic button. And I said, what? He's like, what? And he said, remember you had your panic button like up on your shirt. And I laughed really hard because I thought I had a lot of like actual buttons, like lapel buttons or whatever when I was a kid. Like little sarcastic buttons.
A
Do you remember what was on any of them?
B
No, no, I had a bunch of California raisin ones, like whatever. So I laughed, thinking that I must have had some button novelty but button that said panic or something on it. You could push your panic button. But I'm like, hahaha. Wait, what are you talking about, my panic button? Was it just a novelty button? He said, no, you know the, the little patch, the little round patch that your mom put on your, on your shirt every day. It was your panic button. And I said, what are you talking about? He said. I said, was it like a, like a pin? He's like, no, no, it was like of a piece, piece of cloth. I. I don't know how she affixed it, but she. You had it on your shirt every day and I guess if something was upsetting you, you were supposed to push your panic button. Huh? And I said, I have.
C
No.
B
He's like, yeah, and of course we all made fun of you and pushed the panic button or. No, he didn't say make fun. And Tim's. He did not say we made fun, but he's like, we'd all come up to you and push your panic button. I have zero memory of this. Now I know that I'm an anxious person and I know that I was an anxious kid, but I didn't think that, especially in the 80s or mid-80s, that I was like sort of labeled as an anxious kid who might need certain like kind of little accommodations. Accommodations or something like that. And unfortunately, like my mom is gone now. I will ask my dad.
A
I was wondering if that was something that would have ever maybe gotten on your dad's radar.
B
It probably was on his radar, but I don't think he'll remember it. He has a worse memory than that.
A
Do you want me to text him?
B
He And I text a lot. Give me your phone. Throw it out the window. But I am. I can't explain it. That is such a very specific thing. Somebody said, well, maybe Tim's misremembering. And I'm like, no, we just. Like, we just went back. Like, he remembered all kinds of things. Like, is this literally a repressed memory? I mean, second grade is a long
A
time ago, or at least a pressed memory.
B
Right. Anyway, I've been sort of like. Like, I've been sort of grappling with that the past few hours. Like, what. What was the story there? Was it sort of like, well, your kid's a little special, so we do this, or was it a joke? Like, did my mom do it sort of as a. Kind of a. Kind of a goof a little bit or something? Because I was a little bit anxious, a little bit nerdy. And what did the adults think? What did the kids think? What did I think?
A
Think? I'm trying to figure out what the kind of therapeutic. Can I also point out we are taking a different way home again.
B
I saw you.
C
Yeah, yeah. Google Maps takes us a different way. This entire.
A
Whatever town. We'll come back to the panic button or something. I think this is absolutely adorable.
B
It's a cute little town, but I don't think we've.
A
I don't think I've ever been through this town. This is. This is charming as. I'll get out.
B
If you said. If you saw something that said Old Olmsted. I'm guessing this is Olmsted Falls, not North Olmsted.
C
Oh, it's a community church.
B
Okay. Olmsted Community Church.
A
Historic Olmsted Falls.
B
Olmsted Falls.
C
We came through here. Now that. I made that turn right there. I remember going to Valley City.
A
Maybe when you have Drew putting things together.
C
I don't know.
A
Maybe.
C
But we have not come home this way.
A
I would remember this because this is where I live now.
B
Yeah, right.
C
This is.
A
This is. I mean, about as charming. I'm wondering, Andrew, look at the tire swing.
B
Literally a tire swing.
A
The old oak tree. I mean, it's sad Bobby didn't come home from the war.
B
Yeah.
A
But otherwise, real kind of, you know,
C
you point out this building. Yeah. I think it was when it was just Andrew and I.
B
That white building. When I saw that white building, I knew we were getting close to my grandma's house.
A
This is as cute as it gets. But all that. All that being put aside. I guess what I'm trying to understand, Andrew, is what the. Because this my Guess would be this was something that. That some, you know, group of parents had maybe come up with for if there was a kid who was a little on the anxious side as a way to help them kind of process that. Maybe. But I'm kind of wondering.
B
I don't know. The way Tim said it didn't sound like there were other kids in the classroom who did that. He said there was something that my mom did. That's why I'm wondering if it was sort of a joke.
A
Like, the idea is press this when you're feeling panicked, and then it'll fix it.
B
Yeah. I can see it being like. Like, I could see it being somewhat kidding on the square. I think also, my mom drank.
A
Yeah.
B
Like, maybe that's worth mentioning here as well.
A
But did it lead to needlepoint? Did it lead to sewing projects generally?
B
Exactly. And how was it affixed to my shirt every day?
A
One other quick thing that I'm noticing. I've never seen this particular terminology. There is what I would imagine to be a retirement community here called Columbia park, but it's called an age qualified community. You gotta qualify Age qualified. I'm pre qualified for them, by the way, at age 50. That is a really. I mean, that's. We need to bring back TBTL as mystery solvers. The challenge here, Andrew, is that your mom, who would know, is no longer with us.
B
I thought you were gonna say we need to bring back your mom. I'm like, Luke, I don't even think the power of TBTL has that.
A
I wouldn't put it past the tens, but, I mean, that's a real kind of stumper.
B
It's really kind of scrambled my brain for the past several hours.
A
I think you got to start with Bob.
B
Yeah. Just on the off chance my sister has a good memory.
A
Oh, yeah, that's.
B
She might remember. Yeah.
A
You got to interview anybody who might be able. I mean, it'd be basically your dad and your sister who might be able to give you some intel on this. And then if they can't, we start
B
with your old teachers and my friend. Well, the teachers, I don't. I don't know.
A
Check with Tony.
B
Tony. My friend Tony might remember this. I'll text him later.
A
He wish I had the serial music.
C
What about your aunt? We met your aunt that was at the jump today. Would she know?
B
I don't think so. I don't. I don't think my aunts were knowing what I was wearing to school, but
A
I was trying to look this up on the fly on my phone. About sewing a panic button to your kid's shirt. And all I'm getting is just information about fixing a button on your kid's shirt. Like if a button falls off your kid's shirt. So I wonder if this is something the listeners might know about or even if it's something that the listeners have experience with or if it was completely an invention of your mom. It does. My sense is I think this really happened. Right. I don't think that Tim would just
B
completely hallucinate this based on my conversation. On my conversation with Tim who like. And again, I haven't talked to him in years and years. But like we were going. We probably talked for at least a half hour today, if not more. And just trading memories and like, again, like he has a much better memory of things growing up. I think it does help when you stay in a place. He still lives in Valley City. So I do think that. That maybe this is just me trying to excuse my bad memory. But I do think it helps that when you stay in a place you have more. Less things change around you so you might have more reminders.
A
Yeah.
B
But I don't know that I would remember this if I still lived in Valley City. But I do think that he's a very reliable narrator on this. So just so you know, I don't. I don't. There's not a part of me that thinks he got this wrong.
A
What I would probably do if I was sewing a panic button on my kids clothing is I would say this is gonna be between us because if there's anything that's gonna make a kid panic, it's getting bullied about their panic button.
B
Sure. Well, that's what Tim said in the very innovation. I wish I hadn't stated it the way I did before because he didn't say we'd make fun of you. He just said, yeah, remember? And then we'd all come over and push your panic button.
A
I feel like I'd sew that on the inside.
B
Right. I didn't. Bottom flap of the inside of your underwear. So you're just constantly poking your.
A
Yeah, maybe.
C
I don't think that's.
A
No. This is the guy who wanted to borrow kids for the frog jump.
C
Listen, it was within the context of where we were borrowing a child would not have been.
A
Honestly, right before we walked out there, I actually really wanted us to have some young person with us so that we looked a little less out of place. But. Well, Andrew, that's. Yeah, that's a curious development. I can see why that would be living in your head a little bit. Hopefully we'll be able to get a little bit more information on it.
B
I will say this, one of the tens we were talking. So I apologize to the tens who were there today because I told that story already twice.
A
Sorry I keep doing this. Why does that Ohio Acura have a vanity plate that says Ebola? Have you ever seen such a thing? Why in the living tweedle would you get the vanity plate Ebola?
C
The window's open. Can I catch up to them and ask? We're going opposite directions on the highway now.
B
It might be a grocery store next to sars. So I mean, you know, there's a lot of questions. I just want to give credit to whoever listener I was talking to today because I relayed this story, this panic button story twice before I told you about it to some people. I just, you know, wanted to tell the story. And one of the listeners said, well, we know what next year's TB gel a thon gift is gonna be. Everyone's gonna be in a panic button to sew onto their shirt.
A
That's not a bad idea, I gotta say.
C
I bet those are probably pretty cheap to produce. So as the money guy, I like that.
B
By the way, quick thing about Cleveland, everybody's so nice there. I cannot believe a lot of your
A
personality, Andrew, makes a lot more sense to me having spent time in this area. Yeah, it is a very polite, very. Oh, after you.
B
Yes.
A
Oh, I'm sorry. I mean, I guess the Minnesota version would be opa or how do they say that? Oh, there's hope. It's whatever. The Ohio version of that is right by you.
C
Oh, let me see.
A
It's going on out here.
B
Yeah. And you know, it might have to do with some of the things I've said before about kind of like I. Like I told you I went to a Costco out here with my dad.
C
I was like, I don't want to
B
go to a Costco on a Saturday. But it seems so much more navigable because like everybody just sort of seemed to be looking out for each other and stuff and. Yeah, but aside from that, like the people who work at the, at the ballpark, like there's these a lot of like kind of self checkout machines that I would was a little confused by various aspects of because I'm super cool. And everybody just was like looking they were out of popcorn at one of these places. I'm like, oh, I'll just wait. But some employees like, no, no, I'm going to get this for you now they're like, they snuck behind and got me a bag of popcorn, which I don't even think they wanted me to pay for, but I did anyway. Like, everybody's just so kind.
A
I had a little bit of a. I don't want to say tense moment, but I had to negotiate my way into proper nachos in the, I don't know, seventh inning. I wanted to get some nachos. They had the large nachos, which were like covered in ground beef, and then the small nachos, which did not have meat on them. I ordered the small nachos and they said, you know, that doesn't come with meat. And I said, yeah, that's actually what I want. And then instead of running it under the nacho cheese machine. I know that you don't like this kind of stuff, Andrew.
B
No. But you can talk about it around me.
A
The large nachos, they would run it under the nacho cheese dispenser and get it all kind of in there. There. The small nachos, they just gave you a sealed container.
B
Like a little tub.
A
Like a little tub, yeah. And then just some dry ass chips. And I was like, can I have the good sauce on my small nachos? And the woman was like, that's not really the system. And I was like, well, could I pay a little extra for that? And she said, you know what? It's okay. And then she gave me the nacho upgrade. I don't understand why the small nachos would not get the proper topping of, like, the warm cheese. That's the whole kind of appeal of the thing.
B
And again, given how accommodating everybody was, I'm really surprised that she even questioned it, honestly.
A
Ultimately, she was very nice to me. There was just a moment where we kind of. We hit a little bit of. A little bit of a roadblock, but we got through it. I just realized that was the first of two Nacho experiences I would have in about a 20 hour period. Because today I was so hungry at the frog jump that I snuck off to get what they call walking nachos and what I can. Walking taco.
C
Walking taco, Yeah.
A
I think they actually call them walking nachos.
C
Well, it's a very Midwest thing. Okay, Minnesota, they call them a walking taco for sure. Maybe they call them nachos here. I apologize.
A
No, no, no. I'm forgetting exactly what it was called. I thought because they used Doritos.
C
Yes.
A
And. And same thing. I got it sans the meat, but I got everything else. On it, and it was kind of delicious. But you cannot get to everything because it's in a bag. It's in a specially designed bag that looks like you opened a bag of Doritos and you just dumped a bunch of stuff in, but it didn't. Believe it or not, it wasn't a bag of Doritos, if that makes any sense. It's a specially made container that looks like it was the bag of Doritos.
C
Did you get a fork with it, Luke, or were they expecting it? I got a spot. Yeah. Okay.
B
All right.
A
No, thank you. I walked to the barbecue stand and got a real fork, but even then, I couldn't. You can't eat tortilla chips with warm nacho cheese on them and jalapenos and the like out of a bag unless you reach in, and then it's just an absolute mess. It's kind of. This would be. I mean, on about 10 levels, Andrew, not for you.
C
Can I talk about absolute messes at the food? It was delicious, but I walked over similar to you after our jump, just because of the time of day, and we really hadn't had breakfast or anything. I was also very hungry, and I walked over. I think it was the firefighters had, like, a little hamburger, chicken sandwich, sausage place. I said, great, I'm gonna get one of these. And they listed something on their menu as a sausage sandwich. I'm like, is that just, like, on a bun or like.
B
I asked them.
C
I was like, that's just like, yeah, it's on. Like it's a sandwich. I was like, okay. And they said, it's said onions and peppers and marinara. And I said to the woman, there's two women there taking the orders. The old one was a little older. The other was a little younger. And I said to the older woman, I said, is that messy? I don't really want to get pretty messy, like, with all the marinara. And she goes, oh, no. They put it. They wrap it in foil. And I look over the whole thing, and I look. Yeah. And I look over at the younger woman who's, like, snickering a little bit, because I think she knew either this woman wasn't answering my question honestly or maybe didn't understand my question. And I go over and I get my sandwich after I pay, and it's just like, on a bun. A brat marinara and onions and peppers. And it was red sauce everywhere.
A
It was the red wedding.
C
It was basically the red wedding. It's a miracle. I mean, you guys can look, expect, inspect Me later. It's a miracle I didn't just drip sauce.
A
We do inspect John before bed. Yeah, well, that's part of the flowchart.
B
He's getting older now, though. I wonder if we still have to do that.
C
But this time I want you to do my shirt on so you can see the shirt to see if there's any red spots that my shirt on. But yeah, it was like, it was delicious. It was very messy. Used lots of napkins.
A
Well, here we are, my friends. We're getting close to getting back to our Airbnb for our final night. The TBT Elephant 17 Jumping for Joy is officially now in the rear view mirror. I just want to say one more time, time. Thank you so much to everybody who supported us and donated and called in and was just part of the whole thing. Thanks again to the folks that came out to the frog jump in Valley City. That was great. It was nice. My CBS producers were like, you have amazing listeners. They were very. The tens have just been impressing people all week long, whether it's Bob and Joyce on the zoom or whether it's the. My friend Young, the producer for cbs. So thanks again to all of you awesome people. Here's my question to you, Andrew and John. How are we feeling about the trip home? What's everybody doing? What's the ins and outs of it? And also what are we most excited about getting home to or doing when we get home?
B
Well, one thing I'm excited about while we're still here in Cleveland is I hear, and maybe this is again why the Midwest is maybe the mid best. Because other people think about. Yeah, I know. Don't, don't examine that. Don't examine that like we examine John before bed. Let's just make that a new catchphrase and think of it as complimentary. Apparently our Airbnb doesn't have a bunch of annoying rules about like, you know, de bedding the beds or stripping the beds of the sheets and doing this. And I mean, obviously we're going to be responsible. We're going to throw away whatever food because I think what's going to happen tomorrow is John has the earliest flight. Luke, you have a close second.
A
No, my flight's at 7:00am okay, John,
B
yours is at 9.
C
I have to be at the airport at 9.
A
His flight's at 4.
B
Yeah, sounds like me. My flight isn't until the late afternoon, early evening, so I'm going to be the last one out of the Airbnb and then I'm going to head over to the west side to hang with my parents for a little bit, get one last little visit in before they take me to the airport. And so I'm just really psyched to know that, like, you know, I'll be responsible. You guys know me. I like to leave a tidy place behind. But we don't have to do stupid stuff like strip the beds. Yeah.
A
Didn't my niece say that the stripping of the beds was so the. Because she had done some, like, kind of turnaround service on some Airbnbs. I believe that the idea of the stripping of the beds is so that the folks doing the cleaning know which beds need to be remade and. Oh, yeah, because if everyone makes the beds actually nicely, then they don't know which ones need to be washed. Oh, they'll know.
B
They'll know to wash. Oh, my goodness.
A
Believe you me, they'll see. What is this black powder on this pillowcase? Oh, it's topic.
B
Yeah, that's paint your bald spot sick. That's yours. Yeah. So anyway, so that's what tomorrow's gonna be like. I'm looking forward to it. So I don't have to get up super early. So I'm gonna go home. I'm gonna put this show together hopefully and get it all ready to go so I don't have to work too much tomorrow and I can spend some QT with the parental units.
A
And I'm guessing that your dad is also a get to the airport on the early side kind of guy.
B
Yeah, certainly. And he knows I'm anxious about it. And I also have, like, a suitcase full of equipment that looks very dangerous, so I gotta get through security and everything.
C
Something else that. This is a forward promo for Future episodes of TBTL for folks to look forward to. You and Mr. Walsh. Andrew, you and Bob will be just one thing here.
B
Just so listeners know, this is actually a siren going by us that's not in your car. Go ahead, John.
C
We didn't. Cause you and Bob will be shipping boxes. One to you and one to me. So that's something to look forward to is do we get the boxes?
B
Yeah. Well, also, like my dad, I mean,
A
you're using carrier pigeon this time, right?
B
My dad is not a proud man necessarily, but he is very proud about one aspect of his life and personality, which is he calls himself the Packer. Capital T, capital P. He loves packing things up, whether it's leftovers after a night at the Chinese restaurant or a box. So we dropped off two boxes again, one going towards John's house, one towards Mine eventually. And I'm like, we can probably reuse these boxes. And then I got a text from him later that night. He said, I've already gotten better boxes. So he's reship. He's re. Boxing things. He's reshipping. I mean, I have just knowing that Bob is in charge of this and he might ship them after.
A
Let's go and let Bob.
C
What are the chances he just drives them out to us himself?
B
Pretty good. He did that for a grill one time for me when I lived in New Hampshire and he lived in Ohio. So, like, was andyman. Oh, unfortunately, no. Rest in peace, Andy. Men.
A
I will tell you, I got eyes on the andyman Grill, the. The concept and it is so cool. In fact, I kind of slightly embarrassingly asked your dad for one of the kind of ads for it because they had all kinds of incredibly professional and I would say very well done advertising materials. You know, they were in a bunch of magazines.
B
Very clever.
A
Very clever. I mean, really creative stuff. And so one of those I'm gonna bring home and frame it and put it up in the. In the TVTL studio.
B
Cause it's so cool. But yeah, that's cool. So anyway, so I'm looking forward to tomorrow because I don't have to, you know, be out of the Airbnb until 11. So I'm probably gonna stay up late tonight, maybe get this show put together, maybe put her around, pack up. Last night is a nice night to like, sort of like, relax, pack all my stuff up. And then like I say, I'm not getting to. I'm not getting back to Cleveland until. I'm sorry, I'm not getting back to Seattle until, you know, like, evening on Monday. We have more shows to do on Tuesday, including my after these messages. So what I'm truly looking forward to, this is a weird answer, is I'm looking forward to Wednesday. Wednesday afternoon after tbtl. John and I have already canceled the. The weekly meeting.
A
Love it.
B
And so, like, when I get done with the show on Wednesday, I don't have anything else to do the rest of the afternoon. And that is the moment I'm looking forward to. Just like complete Andy times from about 1pm forward.
A
And I got to imagine Lucy and Bingo.
B
Oh, my goodness. And Genevieve, of course. I mean, I can't wait to see the gang we've had. I've. Today was a huge day back home, apparently. I don't think I told you this, Luke.
A
I saw. I saw a photo on Instagram that was quite heartwarming.
B
Yes, We've been waiting for the day that the cat and the dog will start to bond so much that they snuggle together. And apparently today was snuggling day. They've actually snuggled together.
A
It only happened because you left town.
B
No, that is true. I do think that there's something about the dynamic of probably just the three of them in the house instead of four of us. But once you break that seal, I just think that that's a huge step. Okay, but I've dominated this. What about you, Luke? What are you looking for? Forward to?
A
Well, I'm. I'm taking that kind of early flight, which I was saying to John the other day. I've become sort of weird, or I know weird is the word, but like, I actually am not that anti early flight. And I'm also not that anti red eye flight these days. If I'm going from the west coast to the east coast, the early flight, it sucks getting up, but then there are often fewer people in the airport. Maybe slightly better chance of getting upgraded. And also, if you play it just right, and this may involve us having a couple C minuses tonight, Andrew, kind of you can sleep on the flight because you, like, you wake up, you get to the airport, and then you're pretty drowsy when you get back on the flight, you might sleep through some of it. So I'm gonna do that, and then I've got to change planes in Seattle. And then, you know me, I mean, living la vida loca. I can't wait to mow my lawn. All I can think about is what is happening is the dandelions that have been growing for the last week and a half, the fact that I had everything really buttoned up when I left. So I'm gonna get home, I'm gonna mow my lawn, I'm gonna do some live wire recording. I'm gonna mow my lawn, and I'm gonna sit out on my little deck and I'm gonna stare at my lawn.
B
Nice and wonderful.
A
Probably see Becca.
B
John, you looking forward to anything? Are you just staying in Cleveland?
C
No, I. I am very excited. I've had a great time here. I'm gonna look forward to getting home. And as you guys know, yesterday was actually my Jess's wedding anniversary.
A
Happy anniversary.
C
So, yep, she's still keeping me around. So I think because I missed it, I'm gonna try to, like, maybe pick up something nice for dinner to cook, maybe grill some steaks or something.
A
I was gonna say, what's your romantic meal?
C
I mean, it's not necessarily romantic, just something I don't normally cook. Maybe just a couple nice steaks or something like that.
A
Just gonna cry big beans. Big fat juicy beans.
C
Yeah. So I think I'll probably do something like that. And then.
B
Hey, John, I. I know what you're saying, what you're do to trying. Trying to say here is ribbit.
C
Yeah, exactly. That.
A
Maybe the biggest, other than also the financial support, maybe the biggest gift we received from the THON this year is sexy Ribbit. Yeah.
C
I still think we need an HR department, but yeah. So just like, you know, hanging out with Jazz and paying the pups. I'm really looking forward to it.
B
I'm really excited.
A
Well, you guys, I've said this to you off air, but I'll say it on air. Thank you to both of you for working so, so hard on this and making this a big success this week. I really appreciate you guys doing almost all of the heavy lifting.
B
Well, thanks to the listeners. You know, I think we're a little bit close to it right now because I'm just really depleted and pretty exhausted and looking forward to getting home. But like, when I actually take a moment, probably on the plane tomorrow and I'm reflecting on all this. What a special week.
A
Absolutely. I'm also realizing we did leave the garage door open. We're lucky that Frank miscreants decided how
B
do we know to just play pool? That was me. I got water.
A
We could add street tufts in there in our garage of the Airbnb playing pool.
B
We could have skunks and raccoons in there. I went out there to get water out of that refrigerator today. I hit the button. I must not have hit it right when I came back in. I'm sorry, guys.
A
Well, it doesn't appear to have led to any malfeasance or other things. So everything's coming up tbtl. Again, thanks everyone for all your help and support and your love. You all are the absolute best that's gonna do it for today's episode of tbtl. But guess what. But we're going to be right back here tomorrow with more imaginary radio for you.
B
I'm looking forward to it.
A
Nothing stops a tbtl. So we'll see you then. In the meantime, have a great Monday. Take care of yourselves and please remember, no mountain too tall.
B
And good luck to all.
C
It.
B
Power out.
In this jam-packed, quintessentially TBTL episode, Luke, Andrew, and John take listeners on a winding, hilarious ride as they wrap up the annual TBTL-a-Thon in Valley City, Ohio. The centerpiece is their altruistically-lackluster entry into the town’s legendary Frog Jump competition—an event loaded with more nostalgia, anxiety, and gentle frog encouragement than you’d expect. Along the way, they meander through topics ranging from tense social reunions, fire hydrant mysteries, and Midwest manners, to repressed childhood memories and nacho logistics. The episode’s tone is warm, rueful, self-deprecating, and shot through with the hosts' affectionate banter.
00:35 – 04:10: The crew begins the episode on the road, heading from their Airbnb in Cleveland's Ohio City neighborhood to Valley City for "Frog Day." Luke admits confusion over Ohio geography, prompting a rundown on Valley City’s status as an unincorporated census-designated area within Liverpool Township, Medina County.
Notable Quote:
05:49 – 08:19: Andrew expresses anxiety about the impending social gauntlet: mingling with people from all eras of his life while performing (or "performing") in the frog jump. The team discusses the rules for frog handling, stressing their desire to avoid frog yelling or distress.
07:24:
18:04 – 22:37: Deep local lore: a giant fiberglass frog, fabricated by a specialist for the Marines, now sits on the festival grounds. The “stone frog breathing test” anecdote (22:09) is peak TBTL absurdity.
30:04 – 33:39: Listeners provide answers via text about mysterious fire hydrants in fields (“used to flush water lines and remove rust”). This segues into nostalgia over changing area codes—a symbol of life's shifting ground.
Notable Exchange:
12:06 – 17:17: Both Andrew and John articulate their nervousness—Andrew about mixing friends and family with “the tens,” John about being a good representative while meeting listeners.
16:10: Hugging etiquette is debated: “That's why you're not Luki. Because [my dad] goes for the handshake, I go for the handshake. Now, Joyce, she goes for the hug…” (16:24)
39:39 – 41:18: The existential weirdness of being three adult men competing against children in a frog jumping contest, in your hometown, surrounded by your entire personal history, peaks in this segment.
42:00 – 44:50:
Notable Play-by-Play:
Reflection:
“Remember you had your panic button up on your shirt?” — Tim, paraphrased (51:51)
Andrew is left wondering if this was a serious support for anxiety or just a quirky, joking parental intervention. Listeners are drawn into the “TBTL Mystery Solvers” call for crowdsourced answers.
On their performance anxiety:
“This would be so much worse in Pittsburgh.” — Andrew (41:03)
On their unique approach:
“You go in to a frog jump as a namby pamby pacifist who wants to praise your frog and build their self esteem, and you get four feet, three inches.” — Luke (42:31)
On embracing the absurd:
“I want to Walden this. I want to take our frog and go out into the woods somewhere…” — Andrew (07:55)
On Midwest manners:
“Everybody just sort of seemed to be looking out for each other and stuff.” — Andrew (61:50)
On small town institutions:
[Regarding area codes] “You realize that something so structural can change so quickly.” — Andrew (33:39)
On repressed memories:
“Somebody said, well, maybe Tim’s misremembering. And I’m like, no, we just… like, we just went back. Like, he remembered all kinds of things. Like, is this literally a repressed memory?” — Andrew (53:45)
On listeners and community:
“Thanks again to all of you awesome people. Here’s my question to you, Andrew and John. How are we feeling about the trip home? What’s everybody doing? What’s the ins and outs of it? And also what are we most excited about getting home to or doing when we get home?” — Luke (67:46)
| Timestamp | Segment | Description | |-----------|---------|-------------| | 00:35–05:49 | Setting out & local geography | Leaving Cleveland for Valley City, unpacking township confusion, pre-jump nerves | | 05:49–09:50 | Frog jump anxieties & social dynamics | Gentle frog handling, social pressures, commitment to “losing” | | 09:02–11:24 | Baseball and bonding | Recap of Guardians game, Bob Walsh lore | | 18:04–22:37 | Valley City frog lore | Fiberglass frog origins, stone frog anecdote | | 30:04–33:39 | Fire hydrant mystery | Listener responses, area code nostalgia | | 12:06–17:17 | Social pressure & reunions | Name tag logistics, hugging, and seeing old friends | | 41:18–44:50 | The Frog Jump | Play-by-play; their humane, underperforming style | | 49:03–59:17 | The 'Panic Button' mystery | Andrew’s forgotten childhood intervention | | 62:24–66:53 | Food at the festival | Messy sandwiches, walking tacos, Midwest hospitality | | 66:53–76:49 | Wrap-up, goodbyes & reflections | Future plans, gratitude to listeners |
TBTL’s “Alright, Let’s Lose!” is equal parts existential group therapy, affectionate roast, and anthropological field trip. Through an event as low-stakes as a community frog jump, the show manages to explore social anxiety, community ties, changing traditions, and childhood quirks—never missing a chance for a laugh or a moment of vulnerability.
Whether you’re in it for the Midwestern deep cuts, the offbeat philosophy of losing with grace, or just the sound of three friends gently ribbing each other in a rental Nissan, this episode encapsulates the TBTL spirit: too beautiful, too absurd, and absolutely alive.
Power out.